Expecting the Absolute Weirdest
by Alia D
Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting roller coaster much more interesting. it might be better than it sounds SLASH, ANGST
1. Chapter 1

Alia: Now this is actually a oneshot. The problem is that it's getting so long that it will take a long while before it's finished. So I did this. I'll be sending bits and pieces as the mood takes me. I also wanted people to know that I was still alive and writing. As a matter of fact, I'm sitting here writing in my Journalism 414 class.

For more important news, this is NEW! Yeah I know it's a new story but I mean new as in something I wanted to try. I had another mpreg lined up but decided to try something different instead. You have to read the entire thing to understand what I'm doing if you haven't figured it all out by the end.

So give this a try. I'm pretty sure you won't hate my OMC. Just give it all a try, PLEASE!

Review!

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP (at least I hope not). It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Albus Dumbledore smiled as the other Hogwarts professors began gathering their papers and other things so they could leave right as the meeting ended. Not that the Headmaster blamed them. Even he disliked going over all the annoying little extras of the school year. It was a rather useless activity. The Headmaster trusted his staff, although sometimes he wondered about Trelawney, with their students' education. Even Severus, despite the young man's temper with the Gryffindors.

Dumbledore's eyes focused on his young friend. Severus was marking a few changes to his syllabus. A pleased look was on the wizard's face. Albus smiled in response.

Honestly, Snape's curriculum need no improvements but the potions master obviously didn't mind. The older wizard didn't care. He was happy that Severus was his usual self again. It had hurt to see the potions master so out of sorts by his lover's betrayal.

The Headmaster had remembered being shocked at the man's behavior to Severus. The way they had acted toward each other demonstrated a strong relationship. Apparently, all the Hogwarts staff, who were the only ones that knew of the relationship, were wrong.

Minerva nudged Albus, who smiled and nodded. "Yes, yes. I know." He turned to his staff. "Since we've completed our agenda for the day, is there anything else we need to discuss? Any announcements to make?" He looked specifically at Hooch, who often took the time to talk about the Quidditch teams or fields. Hooch and the others shook their heads.

"Actually-," Severus said hesitantly, drawing his colleagues' attention. Albus watched his young friend fold his hands and sit them primly in his lap. "I do have an announcement to make."

Dumbledore immediately wondered if Severus intended to resign again. His friend's heartbreak had been true and honest. Severus hadn't wanted to stay at Hogwarts so many memories he had of his former lover. The fact that one of the man's best friends worked at Hogwarts reminded him of his pain everyday.

"Oh?" said Minerva curiously. She saw the worried look Albus gave the Slytherin. "What is it, Severus?"

The group of Hogwarts employees were surprised to see a light blush on Severus's face. Albus's eyes twinkled mischievously. "Severus?" The Headmaster found it very interesting that Severus would blush. Usually the potions master had strong controls over shows of emotion.

The potions master cleared his throat. "I...We thought it best that you knew before he arrived. He didn't like the idea of being hexed for stepping inside the school."

"He?" asked Sinistra. "Who's coming, Severus?"

It was obvious to everyone that Severus was stalling. "Severus, don't be embarrassed. Tell us," Flitwick urged but mentally hoped that Severus and his lover hadn't gotten back together. They had all been angry and disappointed that the man had cheated on Severus then married the girl he'd slept with.

"During my time away...I married."

"What?!" cried Minerva, Hermione, and Poppy, although the mediwitch's exclamation came out as a stutter. Albus sat in his chair with wide eyes and a slack jaw. Had Snape not felt so awkward, the old wizard was sure his friend would have enjoyed the rare expression.

He was mirrored by many of the other professors. Hagrid, however, was smiling brightly and congratulated the potions master. Thankfully, though unfortunately for Severus, this brought everyone else out of their shock.

It surprised no one that Dumbledore spoke first. "Severus, child...you've-,"

"Married, yes." Severus made sure not to look at anyone in particular. "I met him while I was away for the potions conference in Greece."

"But that was just over this summer!" exclaimed Minerva. "Isn't it a bit soon for marriage?"

"Unless..." Vector smirked. "Oh I see. Swept you off your feet, Severus?" she said with a raised eyebrow.

He glared at her. "It was nothing of the sort, you busybody." She burst into laughing when she saw the color in his face deepen. Severus scowled when Filius and Pomona started snickering. Hagrid couldn't hide his laughter much anyway. He made the table shake. Binns looked confused. Filch didn't seem to care though he listened in nonetheless.

Hooch grinned at her friend then turned to Severus. She was more than ready to join in on the teasing. "Oh don't mind her, Severus. We're all just a little surprised. I mean you got married after knowing the man for how long?"

Sinistra leaned in when Severus's lips tightened and he dropped his eyes. Like Hooch, she found the situation to interesting to release without a comment. "Come now, Severus. Answer her. How long did you know each other before you married?"

He glowered at her. "Just how is any of this your affair?"

"Because you announced it to ALL of us. Now answer the bloody question," she snapped eagerly.

"...six weeks," Snape snarled softly.

Hooch, Sinistra, and Vector started howling with laughter as the other teachers stared at Severus, incredibly startled by what they saw as abnormal behavior by the potions master. Vector got a hold of herself first. "So our Severus was caught in a whirlwind romance!"

Severus was seething with anger at the teasing. "Not that it any of your business but it was not-,"

"Severus, you married the man after knowing him for a few weeks!" Sinistra said with a huge smile on her face. "You can't deny it."

"He must be pretty smooth to have gotten a hold of you so fast, Severus," said Hooch with a grin. Ignoring his glare, she continued, "Did his looks catch you that well? I can't wait to see him! Maybe he's good in bed. That would certainly do it." Vector and Sinistra's laughs grew louder.

Minerva looked at the three witches appalled while Hermione shook her head in embarrassment. The young witch did keep her eyes on Severus. /This is a bit of a surprise though. I didn't think Severus would do something quite like this./ Some of the other teachers smiled at the four professors.

"Woman," Snape growled. He moved to stand. "I'm going to-,"

Albus quickly laid a staying hand on the potions master's arm. "Now, calm down my boy. They don't mean any harm." He paused to give the three witches a warning look despite the bright twinkle in his eye. The outright laughter dropped to soft giggling and unflattering snorts.

Dumbledore smiled at his annoyed potions master as Severus retook his seat. "You must realize that you have greatly surprised us, Severus. It's hard to believe that you would marry someone so quickly."

"Yes, well, I simply thought it best to warn everyone. He should be here this afternoon." Snape leaned back in his chair with a scowl and crossed his arms.

"Will he be here for lunch, Severus?" asked Poppy. "We'll be able to meet him, won't we?"

The mediwitch had a determined look in her eye. She wanted to see who this man was that Snape married. Severus was a good friend of hers and she really didn't want to see him hurt again.

"Yes. He should arrive around one o'clock. I plan to meet him at the gates."

* * *

_"So what brought you to Greece?" The man asked with a cool stare. "Boredom or a need to run away?"_

_His darker companion scowled at him. "I don't see how that is any affair of yours."_

_"I didn't think there was any harm in asking."_

_"And that is why you asked?" _

_The man laughed roughly. "Oh no. I was curious to see if anyone else had run like me."_

* * *

Severus rubbed his forehead as he felt the splitting headache from earlier grow worse while he started to fend off Albus's questions about his husband. The same questions had been thrown at him since he'd told the bunch of idiots that he was a married man. 

He understood the curiosity of his colleagues. He'd known a man for not even two months before marrying him, but they simply wouldn't understand the circumstances behind his marriage. Severus hoped Albus never learned the truth of why he married. The Headmaster would not be pleased at his reasons or his husband's.

"How old is he, Severus?" Albus asked again.

"Albus, leave me alone." Snape was close to whining in order to silence the old wizard and cursed because he knew it was a habit he'd obtained from his spouse. /Of all the marriage bonds to choose.../

"I don't mean any harm, Severus." Dumbledore smiled at the dark haired wizard. "I can't help myself. I want to know who this man is that's stolen your heart so quickly."

Severus rolled his eyes. "Albus, you make this sound like those god awful romances Sybill reads." Snape was thankful the woman was away at some divination convention and would be away for a few days more.

The bearded wizard bounced on his heels. "Well, that's how it sounds. You do realize how few people marry within weeks of knowing someone. Perhaps it was love at first sight?" he asked slyly.

Snape glowered. "Albus, why are you so intent on romanticizing this?"

Dumbledore grinned knowingly, his eyes bright. "Because if it wasn't a romance, you wouldn't have married or you would have divorced by now." Severus's silence made Albus's eyes twinkle that much brighter.

Severus grimaced and turned back to the front gates. /Where the bloody hell is he? I'd rather not have to kill Albus and hide his body./

A loud pop made Severus narrow his eyes as he saw a figure apparate onto the road about 10 feet away from the gates. Dumbledore adjusted his glasses and Severus wondered just what charms Albus had on those things. He knew Dumbledore didn't need them.

"I'm not late, am I?" called the man as he headed toward the two professors. Albus observed the wizard who could only be Severus's husband.

The man was tall, standing at Severus's height, with short and slightly shaggy, black hair. He had a light tan that could be seen despite the white robes he wore. The robes went up to the man's neck and were buttoned only at the top, over his throat. He had a white button down shirt beneath it along with a pair of khaki trousers and black shoes.

When the stranger came closer, Dumbledore realized that most would see the man as handsome. He was younger than Severus's but not by much. Perhaps their age difference was only by a few years.

The final thing Albus noticed were the dark green eyes. The Headmaster was momentarily concerned about Severus's choice of husband until he noticed that it was only because of his glasses that he could see the green. The man's eyes were nearly black otherwise.

As Severus's husband came to stand before the potions master, Albus was struck by the strong contrast between the two men. Severus in black and his spouse in white was enough to catch anyone's attention but the other physical contrasts were striking as well.

"No," Severus replied. He looked pleased to see his husband. The small curve at the edge of his lips being a telltale sign for Dumbledore. "You actually made it with a few minutes to spare."

"And you said that I'm always late," the man in white said teasingly.

"You are always late." Severus stated with an amused look.

"Yes, well, you know how those idiots work. They couldn't walk straight without asking me how to do it." Annoyance and frustration were clear in his smooth voice. He turned and smiled at Albus. "You must be Headmaster Dumbledore." He stretched out a hand saying, "Severus has told me all about you."

Dumbledore adopted a false look of worry as they shook hands. "Oh dear. That means that I'll have a great deal to clear up." Severus scoffed as his husband laughed with the elder wizard. "However, I'm afraid that Severus has been rather close mouthed about you. I don't even know your name."

Strangely, the man didn't look the least bit surprised. He simply turned and gave Severus an exasperated look. "You love doing things the hard way, don't you?"

"Hard for you perhaps. This way, I won't have to explain anything." Severus and his husband smirked at each other before the man in white shook his head and turned back to Albus.

"My name is Alexius Agathon. A pleasure to meet you, Headmaster."

"Please, my boy, call me Albus." Dumbledore found himself instantly liking Agathon.

"Only if you promise to call me Alex, Albus."

Moments later, the three men were headed back toward the school. Alex appeared to be quietly awed. His eyes were a little wide but that was all that could be seen of his surprise. Albus thought it curious that he would hide most of his emotion. Alex was like Severus in that regard. He appeared to be pleasant but Albus wondered how much of that was true.

"So, Alex, where did you and Severus meet?"

"Albus!" snapped Severus as Alex chuckled in response to his husband's irritation. "He's not here five minutes and you're already interrogating him."

"I don't mind, Severus. He's naturally curious about me." The two men stared at each other for a second more before Severus nodded with a small scowl.

/Ah. A good sign if they can communicate silently./ Albus wondered if he should leave the two of them alone. It had been a week since Severus had arrived and the newlyweds probably felt too embarrassed to reach out to each other in front of him. Severus had never enjoyed public displays of affection.

"We met at a small pub that I own in Greece. Severus was looking for a quiet dinner and I was in the only quiet area we had open that night. Things had gotten a bit noisy with the potions conference. We shared a table."

"You're Greek?" asked Albus, a little surprised. Despite the tan, he wouldn't have thought Alex to be foreign. "You sound-,"

"British? I am, but I moved to Crete."

"The two of you must to have taken to each other rather well. Severus surprised all of us with the announcement of his marriage this morning."

Again, Alex didn't appear to be surprised that Severus waited to tell anyone. "We both admit it was rather fast but we're both happy." He turned to Severus and received a nod in agreement.

"How long do you intend to visit Hogwarts, Alex? Do you have plans to stay in Hogsmeade?" Albus had to ask. Spouses weren't allowed to live at the school unless both were on staff but Madam Pince's husband lived in Hogsmeade to be close to his wife.

Severus and Alex shook their heads. "He has a business to care for Albus, and our home is in Greece." The Headmaster didn't miss the way Alex's eyes brightened when Severus said 'our home'.

"If you don't mind, Albus, I'll be visiting every other weekend if possible."

Albus smiled. "We would be delighted to have you." Because it was obvious to Albus that Alex and Severus made each other happy.

/Harry, my boy, you missed out on true happiness with Severus./ Albus fell back a bit as the two men started talking, forgetting everything outside of each other. /But perhaps it is for the best./

TBC


	2. Chapter 2

Alia: My email was slow. What can I say? Don't expect another installment out for a week or so. Depends on my mood. I've been having a rough time of it.

Thanks to those who have reviewed and are willing to give this story and Alex a chance.

Also, I wanted to warn you now. The further this story gets, the...stranger things might be. Okay, maybe not strange but I think my writing will get a little confusing. I can't help it. I'm confused, Severus is confused, hell, even Alex is confused. But hopefully nothing bad.

Enjoy and remember to review okay.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU, implied character deaths

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

* * *

_"Shhh. It's okay. You can cry if you want." The man pulled his drunken companion into his arms._

_The other man shook his head as he tried to pull himself from the embrace. "No. I won't cry for that bastard. He isn't worth it." Too uncoordinated to fight properly, he went limp against the man holding him. "If he wasn't strong enough to want me despite everything, he isn't worth it."_

_Holding the man in his arms closer, he nodded calmly and decided not to mention that he was already crying silently. "Why did he leave?"_

_"He said I couldn't give him what he wanted. I wasn't what he wanted."

* * *

_

Instead of taking them to the Great Hall where the other professors were waiting, Albus shooed the couple toward the dungeons. "Have some time alone. You haven't seen each other at all this week."

"Thank you, Albus," said Severus. He did want to spend time alone with his husband. Alex echoed Severus's thanks to Dumbledore for his thoughtfulness.

The old wizard chuckled. "I'll have the house elves send you lunch and dinner. I'm sure Alex can wait for a proper interrogation from our colleagues, Severus." He turned and started heading for the Great Hall. "Have a good evening, boys."

Alex watched the wizard in the bright maroon robes leave. "Boys?" he asked his husband while keeping his eyes on Dumbledore.

"You'll get used to it. How was your trip?" Severus asked as they turned to head for the potions master's quarters.

"Longer than I thought it would be. I really have to work on that portkey." A weary tone was in his voice. "The headmaster had a good idea. I don't think I'm up to annoying questions at this point."

"I hope you don't curse my colleagues like you do your employees."

"I take offense to that," he smirked. "I don't curse my employees. I throw hexes at the stupid ones. They're fast enough to get out of the way."

Severus snorted, a small smile on his face at the memory of his husband yelling and tossing badly aimed hexes at one of the waiters. Alex was a sight to see when he was angry although his husband often stated that he had nothing on his cook. Severus agreed. He'd seen the broken plates all over the kitchen floor of the pub and the scorch marks on the walls and ceilings.

"How long can you stay?" asked Severus. Students would be back in a week but he would rather his husband remain with him for a while longer.

"A week at the most." He looked at Severus in apology. "I would stay longer if it wasn't for the pub, Severus."

"I know you have to watch your business, Alex. Don't apologize." The younger wizard was rather considerate when it came to Severus's work. The potions master had decided to be just as considerate about Alex's.

Alex smiled then leaned over to press a kiss to Severus's lips. The wizard in black rolled his eyes as they arrived at his rooms. Alex's smile morphed into a smirk when he saw that Severus kept his eyes to the forefront and away from his husband. Not a lot of people realized how shy the dark wizard could be.

The short haired wizard tilted his head at the portrait. It was of a man sitting regally in a large chair. Sitting in his lap and lying over the arm of the chair was a long green snake that had black rings wrapped around it in intervals.

Alex found himself rather curious about the portrait. The chair was angled so that most of the back faced him and Severus. The man's left arm and shoulder could be seen along with the snake but that was all. /I wonder why he doesn't show his face./

"Password?" came a deep voice that sounded something like Severus's.

"Nightshade," replied the impatient wizard. Severus didn't hate his portrait but always found himself greatly annoyed by it. It always hissed at him after he closed it behind him. Severus knew that the man in the painting had to be Salazar Slytherin. If it wasn't, he was getting rid of it someday.

The portrait opened without another word and the couple entered. As the portrait closed, the snake and the man hissed at them. With a smirk and glance at his husband, Alex hissed back smoothly, slamming the portrait closed before Severus's could see the way both the man and snake had jumped in surprise.

"Isn't that a bit childish?" asked Severus with a raised eyebrow. He stood a few inches away from his husband with his hands behind his back. Alex grinned at him while laying back against the door.

"Childish it may be, but it's greatly satisfying." Alex closed the gap between him and Severus. "Guess what else is satisfying?" He lowered the tone of his voice as he leaned in.

"Not much for subtlety or tact are you?" asked Severus as Alex carefully wrapped his arms around the thinner man. Alexius was slightly more muscular than his older spouse but not by much. Severus laid his hands on his lover's upper arms. "I thought you were tired?"

"I am, but if I'm satisfied, I'll get better sleep. Now do me a favor and cooperate, will you?"

Barely having time to release the appropriate snort, Severus responded to Alex's almost chaste kiss.

* * *

"HE DID WHAT?" 

Hermione winced at Ron's yell. She quickly shushed her friend. "Calm down, Ron."

"B-but Mione!"

"Yes?" she asked. Hermione was more than ready for Ron's shock. She had problems understanding the situation herself.

"Did Snape really get married?" Ron asked curiously, regaining his senses quickly. His eyes were wide with disbelief. The last time Ron and Hermione had spoken about Snape, Hermione had told him that the potions master was going to Greece.

Hermione nodded. "Yes. He said it happened while he was away at the conference."

Ron was still surprised. He knew Snape had been hurt after the fiasco with Harry and Ginny. It had never entered the red head's mind that Snape would get married. It was only five months since Harry had left him to marry Ginny.

Ron scowled at the thought but quickly shook it from his head. As happy as he was that Harry was a part of his family, he would never approve of how Harry and Ginny went about it all. Ron and Severus had become tentative friends and Ron hated seeing his friends harmed.

"If they met when he was in Greece," he paused to let Hermione give him a nod of confirmation. "Then they've known each other-," asked Ron.

"For six weeks." Hermione interrupted. "The conference was only two weeks long. Severus stayed in Greece for three months. He told the Headmaster it was because he enjoyed the country. Apparently, he was spending time with his husband."

"Merlin! This sure is a surprise."

"He shocked all of us, Ron. I didn't think this sort of thing would happen after the situation with Harry even if it's been months since it happened."

"You don't think he married this bloke as a...um what did you call Seamus's last girlfriend?"

"A rebound?" Hermione said with a smile. It was a term she'd picked up from an American friend of hers. She then frowned. "I'm not sure. If it was aftershocks from his relationship with Harry, I don't think Severus would marry the man. That just seems a bit much."

Ron nodded in agreement. "So what is Snape's husband like?"

"I don't know. The Headmaster sent them straight to Severus's rooms. Albus told us that his name is Alexius Agathon and that he lives in Greece. They met there."

"Tell me what you think of him when you finally see him."

"Alright."

"Hey Mione. Um...Do you think I should tell Harry?" The two friends stared at each other quietly.

Hermione shook her head slowly. "No. I don't think so. It's none of Harry's business, Ron. It's more of our interest than his. We're something like friends with Severus. Besides, Harry has Ginny now."

Ron nodded but knew that Harry would find out sooner or later. It wasn't going to be pretty when he learned the truth.

TBC

Alia: You bet your red haired ass it isn't! (coughs) Sorry. Review!


	3. Chapter 3

Alia: Like, I said, it's a week later and here is another piece of my oneshot. A lot of people seem to like Alex even though he is an OMC. I'm happy. I have plans for Harry finding out soon (although it'll be a while before you guys can read it).

In this chapter, you'll be finding out a little bit about Alex. I'm gonna keep adding more info about him as things continue, so you'll see why I'm so happy he and Sev are together. Just don't count your chickens though, okay?

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

_

* * *

_

_"You were married?" he asked._

_The man sprawled out across the persian rug nodded solemnly. "For three miserable years."_

_"Did you love them?"_

_"Yes. I loved her. At least before I found out what she really was. Then I hated the little bitch."

* * *

_

The damn nightmares always started the same for him. He was always running down the familiar street, hoping and praying that he would get there in time as the street appeared to extend in length.

When his frustration grew he was instantly inside his house, staring at the dead bodies. One of his comrade. The other of his enemy. A moment later he would turn and race up the stairs to the second floor, hoping and praying that when he reached the nursery everything would be fine.

It never was of course. He would always hear the cruel laughs and jeers just as he reached the top of the stairs. The bastards not knowing how much danger they were in as he rushed toward the nursery.

He alway arrived as the man he cared for screamed at his attackers.

_"No! Not NATHAN!"_

He could never run fast enough to stop the flash of green light.

And he hated it that he ran to the nursery door just in time to see his love and their child fall to the floor dead, the baby clutched tightly in the man's arms.

Unfortunately, the nightmares tossed him one last 'fuck you'. He would always wake up covered in a cold sweat. His nails would be digging deep into his palms, trying to break the skin. His teeth would be clenched tightly as his eyes stared up in horror. His body would shake and shiver tightly as he lay totally still on the bed.

He always tried not to move when he woke in a sudden shock, but somehow he married a light sleeper and Severus woke up everytime.

"Alex?" whispered the potions master.

Alexius turned his head in the darkness of Severus's bedroom and looked into his husband's dark eyes. Severus stared back silently with concern.

/Damn it./ Scowling, Alex sat up in bed. Burying his hands into his hair, he leaned forward, resting his elbows on his bent knees. "God damnit."

Severus sat up. He gently pressed his hand against his husband's back as he leaned in to check on the younger wizard. He didn't try to avoid the scars, one long, jagged and deep but most thin and short, as he rubbed Alex's back.

The potions master kept his silence as he watched his husband deal with his frequent nightmare. Alex had told him about it and Severus could understand why the man was still haunted by what had happened.

"I want this to be over. I'm happy now. So why am I still dreaming about all of it?" Alex whispered. He started taking deep breaths, hoping to steady his heartbeat and ease the shivering in his body.

Severus hated hearing the desperate tone in his husband's voice. He rubbed Alex's back and shoulder. "Some things stay with us," he said hesitantly.

Alexius's eyes darted to the side to catch Severus's. He wasn't the only one that had nightmares. Severus has told him of his shameful history as a Death Eater. He'd also heard of his lover's painful childhood and school years. He probably knew more than Dumbledore.

"I know," he replied softly. Alex ran a hand across his face. "But it's been three years, Severus."

"Alex, no one is going to get over having their family slaughtered."

The wizard grimaced at his husband's bluntness but knew that Severus was right. The deaths would be burned into his mind forever. "I want to forget the past." He looked at Severus solemnly. "I have my business in a good country with a very amusing husband." Alex grinned weakly at the expected snort. "I want to be happy."

"I'm...content with you, Alex." It was Severus's way of saying that he was happy with Alex and his marriage. Severus couldn't bring himself to say it straight, but a quick glance at Alex told him that the man understood. "But I'll never forget my sins or my failures. I'll never forget the people I couldn't help during the war, both my enemies and my comrades."

Alex nodded, his face showing deep thought. "I suppose that's a good thing. That I don't forget." /People as dark as me can't forget. It means I still have morals, still have a conscience, still have regrets. It stops me from sliding any farther down that road to become less than human./ He closed his eyes for a moment, remembering when he'd run down that road to embrace all he could absorb.

Severus might have been a Death Eater but he'd changed and did what he did for good reasons. Alex had started out with good intentions as well, but they hadn't lasted him long on his road to hell. /You are a better man than I, Severus. You just don't know it./

"Come here," Alex whispered, pulling Severus from his side of the bed to Alex's. The younger wizard needed to hold Severus just to prove that everything was alright now. He couldn't change the past but he could hold on tightly to the present and future.

Alex pulled the professor into his arms and let Severus's straddle his waist. He leaned in and kissed his husband. The two men lay back into the damp sheets as Alex undressed his husband.

* * *

Vector checked her watch again before shaking her head at her equally impatient colleagues. A few frowns were thrown Dumbledore's way, but only received smiles in return.

McGonagall tried to ignore her fellow professors as everyone waited for Severus and his spouse to arrive for breakfast. Albus had told them little to nothing about Severus's husband after sending them to the dungeons. The only information the old wizard had offered was the man's name and where he lived.

Hooch sighed impatiently. "Where the bloody hell are they?! Haven't they worn each other out by now?"

Minerva scowled at the flying instructor. "Do you mind? I think they deserve to have some privacy."

"I didn't say they didn't!" Hooch said rolling her eyes. "Calm down, Minerva. I don't mean any harm. I just want to meet the man already. I keep asking myself why Severus would marry someone after a few weeks."

"Don't you think that's something you should be asking Severus?"

"I don't really think he would answer," said Hermione. "You know he's always been a very private person."

"And that's why we're all so interested!" Sinistra smirked, concentrating on both the conversation and her breakfast. "Severus has no intentions of telling us anything. We have to find things out ourselves."

"All of us are curious, Minerva," said Sprout as she also came to Hooch's defense. "Even you want to meet Severus's mysterious husband."

"He must not be very bad." Flitwick smiled. "His name means Defender of Good after all." He paused. "I wonder if either of them intend to change their names? Alexius Snape sounds a bit off."

"See, Severus. I'm not the only one that thinks so."

Dumbledore smiled brightly as the newlyweds walked side by side through the Great Hall to the Head Table. Severus was in his usual robes and Alex was dressed the same way as before. Glancing discreetly at the others, Albus noticed that all of his staff had their eyes focused on the couple. "Good morning, gentlemen! You've decided to join us for breakfast?"

Severus provided Albus with a single nod in response while Alex gave a bit more opened response. "Yes. We wanted something on our stomachs before we left for Hogsmeade."

"Ah. A tour, Severus?"

"I may as well. If not, he'll go on his own and get lost," Severus responded in his usual caustic manner. He had mellowed a bit though.

The Hogwarts staff all turned to look at Alex to see what his reaction would be. The man merely smirked at his husband.

Poppy cleared her throat and tapped Severus on the shoulder. "Don't be rude, Severus. Introduce us." Severus glared at her as Alex grinned. Pomfrey stared at him until Severus growled low in his throat.

"Fine," snarled the potions master, who looked around at his too smug colleagues. "Pomfrey, this is Alexius Agathon. Alexius, this is Madam Poppy Pomfrey, the school mediwitch." Severus then went back to his breakfast, ignoring everyone else.

Again, Alex didn't look at all displeased or disturbed by his husband's behavior. He turned to the Headmaster. "Would you like to continue, Albus?" He nodded his head at the other professors. Chuckling, Dumbledore introduced Alexius to everyone else which only took a few minutes.

It was during the first meal of the day that everyone saw the way Severus and Alexius communicated with each other. They spoke of course to tell or ask each other common things, such as passing the butter at the table. They talked about where they would go in Hogsmeade and decided on any suggestions offered by the other professors.

But it was their silent communication that captured everyone's eyes. When Flitwick had said a joke that Alex found funny and Severus didn't, the younger wizard would tilt his head to the side and offer his husband an amused look. After a moment, Snape would roll his eyes and turn his head slightly away to hide the small curl of his lips.

When it was suggested that they go to a rather boring exhibit at a museum, Alex had nodded then gave Severus a tolerant smile. The potions master had raised an eyebrow, leaning back with a light frown. Alex had blinked in surprise when Severus shook his head minutely. The wizard in white had smiled in relief.

And after Severus had finished his barely filled plate, it had been Alex that had asked him to eat more. Usually, the duty fell to Dumbledore, but Alex didn't recieve as much trouble for it. He had simply taken Severus's hand before the wizard had dropped his fork and stared at his husband. The two men exchanged a long glance before Severus scowled and added more food to his plate. Alex then brushed his elbow gently against his husband's with an apologetic smile. Severus had paused before nodding again, not taking his eyes from his food. Agathon had sat back with a satisfied look.

The two men left not too long after. Neither realized that they had left a rather relieved group of concerned friends.

TBC

Alia: God, I'm so confused. Anyway, here is the third part of the long oneshot. I said a week. It's been a week, so be happy okay. Any questions? Ask me. I just might answer! Otherwise, REVIEW!!!


	4. Chapter 4

Alia: I...Oh what the hell is there to say? My condolences and sympathies to all the students of VTech and their families. I'm in college and I know if something like that happened...Well, I really wish the best for all of you.

I'm having a REALLY rough time of things right now. I'm having some issues...yeah. Some issues. Right. So don't expect another for a while. It might be a short time, might be long. I don't know.

Anyway, this is more of a in between before anything juicy happens. As for me, I'm going to decide whether or not I should work on a paper for a class. Well a few papers. Oh and does anyone know a martial art teacher that teaches kids? I need the name for an article. Oh and I GOT PROMOTED IN JUJITSU! YEAH!!!

Now go ahead and read and review.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

_

* * *

_

_"Shouldn't you be a bit more surprised?" he mumbled._

_"That you're a bastard? I have you severely out classed."_

_He snorted. "I doubt that. I don't think anyone has fallen as low as I have."_

_"Don't be so sure. I can guarantee that I have you beat."_

_"And where did you pick up your skills?" he said sarcastically._

_His companion smirked. "Oh here and there. Dark wizards are good teachers."

* * *

_

"Can you please explain to me how we ended up in Diagon Alley when we were only going to tour Hogsmeade?" Severus grumbled as they made their way through the crowd. It usually wasn't that bad for either man. More than once had people stepped to the side to get away from Severus with black robes and habitual scowl.

Even Alex didn't have trouble with crowd control. There was something about the man that caused people to get out of the way even faster than they would for Severus. One of his employees said that it was that feeling of danger that caused it. Severus didn't believe it for a second.

He personally believed that Alex simply knew how to move. He'd seen Shacklebolt do it once before, shifting through the crowd with a long born experience. Alex had been an auror for the Greecian Ministry before he'd bought the pub. There was also the fact that his husband worked in a busy pub most nights. Alex was used to shifting his way easily through people.

"Well," Alex replied, "You weren't very happy that the apothecary in Hogsmeade didn't have your ingredient. I wanted to see Diagon Alley anyway, so here we are. You aren't regretting the decision already are you?"

"If I didn't need that ingredient today, I wouldn't bother running through cattle!" The older wizard snapped. Alex grimaced. Severus' temper had gotten a lot better since their marriage but the potions master's patience was becoming thin.

The wizard in white gave a sigh of relief when they reached the apothecary. He himself didn't like crowded places and that was the usual atmosphere for Diagon Alley.

Both relaxed as they entered the relative quiet of the apothecary. Severus immediately headed down one of the isles, ignoring the old wizard at the register. Alex followed sedately, barely glancing at the old man.

Severus observed the items on a low middle shelf critically as Alex stood off to his side, looking around curiously. He didn't love potions like Severus did, but the subject did interest him. "This brings back memories," whispered Alex.

Severus paused to look at him curiously before turning back to the jars filled with a black jell. "Of what?"

"Our fifth date."

Severus didn't even turn around. "Our fifth date consisted of watching you screaming abuse at your employees, dragging me through the countryside to get the correct shipment of wine, and having an argument with the owner of the vineyard. We barely got back before midnight after that little duel you had with the man's son."

"The little prat should have minded his own business! I was talking with his father and not once did I threaten the old man. I wouldn't have done anything like that." Severus had to stifle a response. "Besides, we finished at ten. You were the reason we barely made it back before midnight. You absolutely had to go to that night market."

"It had fresh and rare ingredients. It was also highly suggested at the conference."

"And we spent two hours combing through all the items they were trying to shove our way." He smiled. "It was a bit fun though. You were nicer at the market than you were when we went to the apothecary in Athens."

"You shouldn't have interrupted me."

"I didn't know things were that delicate. I didn't think an ingredient would fall apart because of sound waves. It's ridiculus! And I'm not getting into when I came into your lab while you were working."

"As if you were any less grouchy when I tried to talk to you while you were in your office writing up expenses for the pub."

Alex grimaced. That had not been pretty. He had been a real bastard and hadn't even known it. Severus had stormed out of the room and didn't speak to him for the rest of the day. It had taken a lot of groveling to get things straightened out. "Okay. I'll admit that I'm not much better. Both of us hate being disturbed while we're working."

"That's because we both enjoy it." Plucking a thin vial with a cloudy peach liquid inside, Severus headed to the front of the store. Alex nodded in understanding. Despite their complaints, both men really did love their jobs.

"Severus?"

Alex and his husband, who had just finished his purchase, turned to look at the tall blond standing in the doorway. A pleased look came over Severus' face as he nodded to the man. "Draco. What brings you here?"

Smiling, Draco moved closer to his godfather while observing the man to Severus's side. /A bit close isn't he?/ "I saw you through the window and thought I would stop and say hello. I wanted to see how your trip to Greece went also."

Seeing Draco and Alex staring at each other, Severus sighed. "Alex, this is my godson."

The man's eyes seemed to light up with understanding. "Oh! I'm sorry, Severus. I forgot."

"Severus?" Draco asked slightly confused.

Clearing his throat, Severus said, "Draco, this is Alexius Agathon." He sighed. "He's my husband."

Alex chuckled as Draco stared at Severus. "Did you get this reaction from your colleagues?"

"It looks like I'm getting it from everyone," mumbled Severus as he watched his godson regain his senses.

"Your husband?" Draco exclaimed. He tried to overcome his startled reaction as he continued questioning. "When did this happen?" He stared at the smiling man beside Severus, then turned to the older man.

"Over the summer, while I was away."

Draco shook his head as he tried to figure out what to say. Alex nudged Severus forward. "Why don't we go for lunch, Severus? I think your godson deserves something resembling an explanation."

* * *

In the end, they decided to tell Draco the truth. The real truth, not the vague facts that led the inhabitants of Hogwarts to their ideas.

Stunned gray eyes stared at them in shock. "What?"

Alex tried to smother a grin while Severus nodded seriously.

Draco shook his head in disbelief as he continued staring at the married couple. He stopped as his mind finally caught up then glared at them. "You did what?!" he shouted. He was loud enough to catch the attention of those at the other tables.

"Draco Malfoy, keep your voice down! You're a grown man. Stop shrieking like a child," snapped Severus as Alex said, "I guess we handed you quite a surprise."

Draco snorted and took a small sip of wine. A disapproving look was shot at the two men. "How did you expect me to act after telling me why you got married, Severus? You don't just get married because you felt like it!"

"Why not?" asked Alexius. "We get along, and we're compatible enough." He decided not to mention anything about sex. "It's not as if we have anyone else."

"There is the fact that," Draco paused to shake his head. He brushed his hair from his face. "Do you two love each other?"

"Draco, you do not have to be in love to be married. But..." Severus and Alex shared a look and a small smile. Draco sat back in his chair as he was surprised to see it. "We are happy with each other. We care about each other. That's enough for now."

"It simply wasn't something I would expect from you, Severus."

"You mean after Potter left me?" he asked with a raised eyebrow.

Malfoy blinked in surprise at the calm tone in which his rival's name was said. After Potter had abandoned Severus to be with Ginny Weasley, the potions master hadn't been able to speak of the man without a hint of anger, hatred, or bitterness in his tone.

"Draco, I admit that we were..."

"Drunk?" Alex suggested with a grin.

"Slightly inebriated," Severus continued with a scowl at his husband, "when we made the decision to marry, but it's rather obvious that we still agree with our original assessment. It was the right thing to do although it was foolish in how we went about it."

Draco stared at him then looked at Alexius. "I still have to wonder how the two of you can still be so absolutely sure of this. You can't possibly have a good marriage after knowing each other for that short amount of time!"

Alex shook his head. "That's where you're wrong." He raised a hand to halt Draco before he could start talking. "Let me explain. Severus and I spent that drunken night talking about our history. It was because we had so many similarities that we thought we were compatible."

"Similar experiences can only take you so far."

"That's true. That is why Severus and I have done our best to get to know each other."

"And we know each other well, Draco. We understand each other."

"And you love each other?" Draco was not going to let Severus end up in an unhappy relationship. He already had Potter on his list. Draco didn't want to have to add another name.

"We care for each other. We're happy with each other. That's enough for now."

* * *

_He knew they were arguing because they were in shock. Who wouldn't be, but he was extremely surprised that he was yelling at the dark haired man before him. He shouldn't be but he was. _

_He had learned to keep his temper the hard way. People didn't believe he had control but he did. He had to. But after so much time, it was startling to be screaming and throwing insults at his new husband and not have that control in place._

_But the man before was giving as good as he got, especially since he had started the argument. Even as they stood only inches apart screaming, he didn't have a look of fear in his eyes._

_The man before him, yelling insults and obsenities, wasn't afraid of him. He didn't cringe in fear, start crying, or run and hide. _

_It made him realize that no matter how drunk they'd been, perhaps they'd made the right decision.

* * *

TBC_

Alia: I felt generous to day. Next chapter: More info on Alex and a chat with Dumbledore. REVIEW!!!


	5. Chapter 5

Alia: I shouldn't be updating so soon but I need a little something to perk me up. I have finals this week, I have to go to the doctor's office, and my granddad died. So, it's been pretty busy. I just have this urge to slam my head into the nearest wall.

Don't expect another one of these for a while. You guys are catching up with me too much writing wise although I'm still ahead.

I've started a little snippet series that I'll put up sooner or later on my site. I was going to take a break from anything sane for a while (hence this story and the snippets), but I had ANOTHER DAMN IDEA that I plan to work out while I'm away in South Carolina. The thing I want to know is who would you stick Severus with other than Harry? Don't forget to answer this in your review.

Well...well...start reading people.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and take an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting the Absolute Weirdest

Severus wasn't quite sure how he'd ended up in such a position but he knew that it wasn't his fault. It was easy for him to blame his husband for this. Especially since...well it was his fault! It usually was because the man was the only one that could convince him to try something like this.

Not that it was too difficult. All Alexius needed to do was kiss him long enough that he actually forgot his name. He'd even challenged himself once to make Severus forget a potion the older man was reciting in his head. It worked much to Severus's shame.

So why Severus was still a little shocked at himself after another 'adventure' with his husband, he would never know.

The potions master couldn't stop himself from looking around nervously as his husband chuckled in front of him. "Relax, Severus. Everyone is busy in the castle."

"That doesn't mean much around here!" Severus hissed at the nude man kneeling between the potions master's spread legs. Severus was lying on his back, his bare legs brushing Alex's upper thighs. He glared at the younger man as Alex retrieved his wand from his discarded trousers.

Alex smirked at his sated, but annoyed lover as he banished their release from Severus's body. Their black and white robes lay soiled and rumpled beneath them after being used temporarily as a blanket for the men's activities. "It's a little too late to be worried about propriety now. You certainly weren't worried a few minutes ago."

Severus blushed and glowered at the triumphant look on his husband's face. The bastard was right once again.

For the last few days, the newlyweds had been cooped up inside Hogwarts. When they weren't in bed, they were preparing for Severus's classes or exploring Hogwarts. Neither man minded. Alex knew he wouldn't spend much time with his husband during the school year.

It was only later, two days before students arrived, when Severus claimed that he needed a few

fresh ingredients from the Forbidden Forest. Alex welcomed the idea of going outdoors and followed his husband to a special herb garden Severus and Pomona had hidden at the edge of the forest. The roots from the trees above gave the special herbs stronger properties.

The two men had walked from the castle toward an area shaded by some tall trees of the Forbidden Forest. It was close to the gates of the school where students hardly went.

Alex had given the garden a critical examination before turning in a circle. The pub owner then mentioned that it was a nice private spot. Only then did Severus realize what the sneaky bastard had planned.

Alex had done the same thing to him before at the pub of all places. The potions master had been dragged to the office when his husband had uttered those same exact words. Severus hadn't made it out of the room before Alex had him. The same scene had happened but with Severus lying on his husband's desk rather than the ground.

He had quickly backed away from his husband, snapping at him angrily for even getting such an idea. The castle wasn't that far away. Any noise could attract something from the forest as well. If they rolled anywhere, they could possibly damage some of the plants and how would they explain that to Professor Sprout. Alex had only walked toward Severus, removing his white robes as the potions master started to yell.

The next thing Severus knew he was naked and on his back. Rather humiliating, no matter how good Alex was in bed.

"And after that last wail," Alex continued.

"Bastard," muttered Severus as he tried to move away and close his legs. He wasn't usually quiet when they were together, but he wasn't loud at all. Severus simply hadn't been able to help it. His orgasm had caught him by surprise and he hadn't remembered the notion of silence. He could only clutch his husband's scarred back and shake as it hit.

The younger man laughed. "Oh don't be so upset. I'm not asking to do it in your lab now am I?"

Severus scoffed at the notion of screwing his husband in his lab. Alex had told him plainly once that it would never happen. The man had crinkled his nose and said that after seeing some of what Severus worked with, it wasn't going to happen. It was quite a change from Harry Potter, who seemed very determined to be taken over Severus's desk.

"Now, spread your legs and think of England."

Severus cuffed the younger man's head. Alex rubbed his head and chuckled. "How many times have I told you not to use that phrase?"

"I've forgotten. Come on now," Alex said with a smile. His voice, however, was slightly more serious.

Embarassed as he usually was by the 'ritual', Severus leaned back and spread his legs slightly as he stared up at the trees and sky. He tried to ignore the prying fingers and Alex's head between his legs. But he didn't say anything. Not anymore.

The first time it had happened, Severus had understood. He had been injured after all and wanted to know how bad it was. The next time it occurred, Severus had complained only to have Alex insist then proceed to ignore him. Another time, Alex had checked Severus quickly before the potions master had regained the frame of mind to complain.

But Severus had caught Alex at a disadvantage one day, and a rude comment from the potions master had caused a rather unexpected reaction.

He'd been very surprised when Alex sat up with a dark look in his eyes before rising from the bed and storming into the bathroom. Severus had laid in the bed staring as his husband loudly slammed the door behind him.

Alex had always seemed used to Severus and his moods, even when they'd first met. The man was more in tune with the potions master than Albus had ever been. Alex always realized whether Severus was being serious or teasing harshly, which was what the potions master had meant. He had never meant to belittle Alex's concern. It simply embarassed him that his husband did it every time they were together.

It took over ten minutes before Severus could convince himself to check on Alex, although he had mentally refused to apologize. Alex left the bathroom just before Severus reached the door.

The business owner had quickly apologized to his older husband, giving him an explanation for his ire. Severus never complained about Alex's treatment toward him again. Not even in jest. Alex's ex wife had left him with a few deep emotional scars.

A warm kiss on his inner thigh let him know that his husband had finished his inspection. "Done. You're fine." Severus nodded in return. "Ready to head back?"

"The minute you clean our robes." Both men stood; Severus hiding a wince. He began to dress as Alex knelt down and picked up their robes.

As he waved his wand over the soiled robes, he smiled at Severus. "So, are you eager to see your students again?"

"Alex, I hope that isn't suppose to be your idea of a joke?"

"No, no!" exclaimed Alex playfully as he handed Severus back his robes. Alex began reclothing himself. "I didn't mean anything like that." He pulled on his robes and lifted his neck to button his robe.

Severus saw the near invisible movement Alex gave as his fingers touched the scar over his throat. It was diagonal, going from the top of the right side of his throat to the bottom of the left side. The scar often drew Severus's eyes in concern, just as the one on Alex's back did. It looked like someone had tried to rip his throat out.

As Alex's fingers brushed his scar again, Severus shook his head at the emotion that flashed through his husband's eyes again. It happened everytime he touched the scar, but unlike the ones on his back, chest, arms and legs, Alex didn't hate the scar over his throat.

His husband always gave a little smirk of dark satisfaction when he touched the scar.

And it always sent a shiver of fear down Severus's back.

It was the only time he questioned what people said about Alex. About that aura of danger that Severus never felt. He knew his husband was a dangerous man. Alex had been an auror and had to have gotten all of those scars somehow. The man was also an excellent duelist. He and Severus had gone head to head to see how they ranked against each other.

But Alex, in Severus's eyes, wasn't dangerous towards many people. If you harmed him or someone he even slightly cared for, it was a good idea to run but Severus didn't think Alex would harm anyone without reason. Not like Voldemort did.

At least that's what Severus told himself.

"I want to know how long I can stay on my last day. Should I leave early before the students arrive?"

Severus stared at Alex for a long moment. "No. In fact I want you to stay for the feast and sorting."

Alex looked at him curiously. "Really? Why? Not that I mind."

"I..." He paused for a moment. "I want the Slytherins to meet you."

The man in white smirked. "So, I'm meeting the in laws. I thought I'd done that after meeting Dumbledore and the others."

"Funny," Severus said with a deadpanned tone. "I mean that I want them to know who you are. The last thing I need is for them to follow me around trying to figure out who the idiot following me around is."

Alex nodded. "Alright. Maybe I'll get sorted too. You never know."

Severus stared. "If you're a Gryffindor, I'll divorce you."

"Severus!"

* * *

_"Well?"_

_"Don't ask about them. Ever."_

_He scowled at the man sprawled across their bed. His fingers continued to caress the imperfections. "Why?"_

_"Because I won't be able to answer you and quite frankly I don't want to." He looked at the man sitting up beside him. "Can I ask you about yours? Why they're there? Who did them and why?"_

_"...No. I don't like being stripped bare in such a way."_

_"Exactly."_

TBC

Alia: (sighs) Wish me luck people and uh...if anyone takes Classics 201, email me IMMEDIATELY! Otherwise, REVIEW. And answer my question!


	6. Chapter 6

Alia: So it's been a couple weeks since I edited this bad boy. I haven't forgotten about it like I did my Quizilla account, but I was stumbling a bit for a moment to write the next part. I'm still ahead of you guys.

I thought it would be nice to go ahead and update now that all the drama is over and I have some quiet time. I'm working on my snippets and it's coming along fine. I plan to revamp my website (because it's just plain ugly) and put up a couple of fics that I've been working on (mostly YGO, GW, and HP). So be patient. It'll be a while before you get another one of these.

Also, I posted this because I really wanted to ask everyone a question. It was in a review so I thought I'd ask.

Do you guys want this to be an mpreg? I didn't really have plans on an actual pregnancy (I still didn't know if the guys should even have a kid in their lives) but I had an idea and it would fit in rather well (well according to the title of this story anyway). So should I?

Anyway, enjoy! It's short of course and the next won't be much longer, but you finally get to see the Slytherins and the talk between Albus and Harry. I hope I didn't screw that up.

Remember to review!

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting the Absolute Weirdest

Severus waited patiently as his Slytherins took their seats. The older students made certain to either stand in the back or have seats. The younger students sat on the floor facing Severus and the fireplace the potions master stood beside.

He had finished the speech he gave his snakes every year but decided it was finally time.

"I decided that you should know before the rest of the other houses learned of this." Severus saw the curious looks on the younger students and the hidden concern of the sixth and seventh years. "As my House, you have the right to know before anyone but the other professors. I will also trust that you will keep this information in-House. The last thing I need is the Gryffindors sneaking into the dungeons because of inconvenient curiosity."

As Severus walked to the Slytherin dorm entrance, many of his students exchanged confused looks behind his back. The potions master was obviously in good health and was still employed at Hogwarts. They didn't understand what Snape's secret was.

One of the older boys shrugged. They would just have to wait and see.

Everyone watched closely as Severus opened the entrance and whispered softly outside. The professor then stepped back to allow a man in white robes to enter. The two adults walked side by side to the fireplace.

One of the younger girls shivered as Alexius walked past her. The man was younger than Professor Snape and rather good looking, but his presence...unsettled her. Something about the man was different than it was with other wizards.

Severus and Alex exchanged a look before Alex nodded with a small smile. Severus turned to his students. "This summer, I made a rather..." Severus trailed trying to describe his decision.

"Extremely important?" Alex offered with a smirk.

"You are not that special," Severus replied coolly, not turning away from his students. He knew Alex was amused and Severus caught a few smirks and grins from his students. "I made a decision to marry this summer."

Most of the younger boys looked gobsmacked, a few older boys had dropped jaws, and a majority of the girls looked happily surprised.

"As I'm sure you can deduce, this," Severus motioned toward Alex. His husband nodded respectfully to the students. "Is my husband, Alexius Agathon."

"It's a pleasure to meet all of you. Severus has told me all of your dirty little secrets." A glare met Alex when he turned to his husband.

* * *

Alex stood silently in the Astronomy Tower, staring out the window at the starless sky. He'd been standing in the same spot for the last hour, shifting from time to time but never moving from one area. 

"Alex?"

"Yes, Albus?" he said softly, acknowledging the Headmaster but not turning to face him.

"Are you alright, my boy?" Dumbledore walked forward to stand beside Alex.

Still not looking at the old man, Alex smiled tightly. "I'm fine, Albus. I'm...just not very excited about leaving tomorrow morning."

"Ah. You will miss Severus?"

There was a solemn look on his face. "I suppose so."

Albus paused, curious at the response. "You love him."

"I care for him a great deal."

"Caring is one thing, Alex, but love is something else. You do love him don't you? You would not have married him otherwise."

"Albus," Alex hissed in a suddenly sharp tone. "Our marriage is none of your business."

"I will not have Severus hurt again, Alexius." The Headmaster was surprised at the sudden anger in Alex's voice. He had never expected the man to be short tempered at all, especially the way he put up with Severus's caustic commentary.

"He is not your son, Dumbledore. He is, however, my husband." Alex closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He quickly raised a hand to prevent Dumbledore from speaking. "You misinterpret me, Albus."

"First, I want you to listen." He finally turned to Albus. "Don't interfere. I know how manipulative you can be no matter how well meaning it is. You interfered with Severus's former relationship. Not anymore. Don't get involved in this. Whatever happens will always be between Severus and I. Only us Albus."

Alex sighed violently. "I can't give you what you want, Headmaster. I can't say it. I can't tell you in those words how much I care for Severus, but know that he won't come to harm by me, Albus Dumbledore."

"Harry Potter told me the same thing."

"Do not compare me with that little fool. He'll pay for his decision sooner or later." Alex smirked. "But it turned out well for me. I'm not giving up Severus."

Albus watched the younger wizard. "Even if it means that children might not be in the equation?"

Alex nearly snarled. "Didn't I tell you not to compare me with that bastard? Just because we can't have children doesn't mean that I'll leave Severus." He stiffened. "Besides, I don't want children. I don't think I ever will."

"Hmm." Albus didn't really question Alexius' feelings toward Severus. He had seen the way he looked at Severus and how they interacted. They were different than what Severus and Harry had been. They were closer than the former couple could have ever been. "You do love him."

"You know I told my ex wife those words in order to describe how I felt about her. Severus actually told Potter the same thing. Don't taint what we have by using those words."

Dumbledore actually smiled at the anger in Alex's voice. He laid a hand on Alex's shoulder. "Thank you. You've made him happy, Alex and it's good to know that both of you 'care' for each other."

Alex shot Dumbledore a dark look, which Albus ignored. The older wizard did paused because he'd felt something odd from Alex. Then shaking his head, he continued.

"As I said, you would not have married him otherwise."

Alex froze for a moment then a smirk slipped onto his face. "Oh?" he asked with a raised eyebrow. "Are you so sure of the reason we married?"

Nodding at the surprised look on Dumbledore's face, Alex turned and walked back to the dungeons. He wanted to spend the rest of his time at Hogwarts with his husband.

* * *

_"Did you ever tell him?"_

_"That I loved him?" He snorted. "No. Not after all the experiences I've had with the word."_

_The other man nodded with complete understanding._

_"Did you tell your lover?"_

_"A few times. When he desperately wanted me to say it."_

TBC

Alia: Yeah, I know. Kinda confusing. REVIEW!!! And answer the question! Mpreg or no mpreg!


	7. Chapter 7

Alia: Huh! Looks like it's been a while since I updated. I was gonna wait longer but I decided to be nice and everything. Maybe now I'll get off my ass and into the next part of this. I'm still ahead of you guys.

I have more ideas spilling into my head but I'm going to be summarizing a lot of things for later. I may put of some of my snippet series when I get to thirty or something. They all suck anyway. So I might not update for a while. Good news though. I know how Harry is going to find out about our love birds (gags).

Oh and Happy B-Day Tia. I wouldn't have gotten a guy picked without ya.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

"WHAT?!"

Ron winced as the twins exclaimed across their shop. He was happy that it was a quiet day and his brothers' shop only had a couple customers. Said customers were staring curiously.

"Keep it down!" hissed Ron as he glared at the twins. The two men looked totally gobsmacked. It warmed the youngest Weasley boy that he could shock his brothers into silence. Even if the news didn't involve him directly, but he had to tell someone. He simply couldn't tell the one that he thought needed to know.

"Severus Snape got married?" whispered Fred in disbelief.

"Are you serious?" The twins whispered, exchanging a quick look before turning back to their brother.

Ron nodded. "This summer. Hermione found out when he came back from a potions conference in Greece. That's where she thinks they met."

Fred scowled and grabbed Ron's ear. Stifling a squeal, Ron's upper body was yanked over the counter so that he could face his unhappy siblings.

"Oh really?"

"Now tell us, little brother. Why didn't you give us this delightful piece of information before now." George, as unhappy as his twin, pointed toward the calendar. It was nearly Halloween.

Fred let Ron go. The man took a step away from his twins and the barrier between them. Rubbing his ear, Ron answered, "Well, Hermione said that it really wasn't anyone's business but Snape's, so we shouldn't say anything." He fidgeted. "I couldn't keep it to myself anymore. I had to tell someone!" He exclaimed.

George and Fred exchanged yet another wide eyed glance between them. "Are you saying-," George began.

"That dear old Harry-,"

"Who abandoned Snape-,"

"For our stupid baby sister-,"

"Fred!" snapped Ron. The twins hadn't been particularly happy with the way things had happened between Harry, Ginny and Severus. Molly had been one of the many who hadn't cared. She hadn't been happy with Harry and Severus anyway.

"Doesn't know that his-,"

"Ex is newly married?"

Ron nodded reluctantly at the nearly vicious gleam in the twins eyes.

Fred turned to George. "You know, George, I do believe that we should try working on something especially for dear old Harry."

George nodded excitedly. "Maybe an exploding wedding cake?" He rubbed his jaw and shook his head. "No no. Too boring, but we'll think of something won't we."

"Of course!"

"NO!" yelled Ron. He started waving his hands in front of the twins. "No! Absolutely not!" When Fred opened his mouth to respond, Ron yelled, "Do you think mum will ever let us hear the end of it?"

Fred grimaced as George looked at Ron curiously. "Us?"

Ron smirked at little. "Hey, before this mess started, Snape and I were becoming friends." He shrugged.

"Well," said Fred, "Since we can't have fun with our soon to be brother in law, how about we send Professor Snape a wedding gift?" He asked with a grin.

Ron paled as George ran for the back of the store, screaming out ideas over his shoulder. "What? NO!"

* * *

Severus ignored Flitwick's giggle as he watched Horus land next to his plate at breakfast. The large black hawk that belonged to Alex was careful not to knock anything over as he stuck his leg out to Severus. The bird gave a very insistent cry.

The potions master paused as he reached out for the letter Horus had brought him.

Horus was usually a quiet bird, if not totally silent, and very patient. He never acted differently either unless something was off with Alexius. The bird had a habit of matching his master's moods. Currently, Horus was acting rather agitated.

/What could possibly be the matter?/ Severus wondered as he thought about Alex. Thinking that his husband had unleashed his fury upon the hapless waiters and waitresses, Severus quickly removed the letter and opened it. "Thank you, Horus."

Without another sound, the bird flew away from the table leaving the concerned mate of his master.

"Is everything alright, Severus?" asked Flitwick. The potions master appeared rather worried.

"Yes. Everything is fine." Severus closed the letter and stared into space for a moment. He then turned to Albus who was two people down from his seat. "Headmaster?"

Dumbledore looked up with a smile, but he immediately noticed the same worried look that Filius had caught. "Yes, my boy? What is it?"

"Do you mind if I take the next three days off? I know you needed me to chaperone for the party tonight but..."

It didn't take a genius to see that it had something to do with Alexius. Albus nodded. "Not at all. I'll have your classes covered immediately."

"No. Just cancel them, Albus." He stood from his seat, not really paying attention to his colleagues.

"Severus, is everything alright?" asked Poppy.

"Yes. Everything is fine. I am needed home for a few days." Severus left the Head Table for the Slytherin table. After exchanging a quick word with the Head Girl, the potions master left the Great Hall at a brisk pace.

Minerva frowned. "I hope nothing has happened to Alexius."

"Oh, I don't think any harm has come to him," replied Albus. The old wizard did hope that whatever sent Severus rushing back to Greece wasn't bad.

* * *

_"You never have to worry about something like that."_

_"Why not?" He glared. "That's why he left."_

_"I'm not him for one thing. And I don't want-,"_

_"Why not?!"_

_He looked at him with a sad smile. "You already know."_

* * *

Severus called his husband's name again as he stood in the foyer of their home. He had been to the pub at first, only to be told that Alex had called in sick that day and didn't want to be disturbed.

The mere notion of Alexius being too sick to come into work was surprising to Severus and his husband's employees. The head cook, an old, heavy set woman with a worst temper than his husband, had immediately contacted Severus using Horus.

_"The hardheaded idiot has come here with the pneumonia during one of our coldest winters and he expects us to believe that a little cold is stopping him!"_

Severus had also been told by the old woman that Alexius always returned in the worse shape possible.

_"He's right sickly when he comes back to work. Looks like he hasn't slept in days or eaten!" She snapped, sounding particularly scandalized by the lack of good food. Her face sobered. "He's always like this around this time of year. Maybe you can do something about it this time."_

The cook had told Severus flatly that it was his duty as Alex's husband to do something to help him with his problem. She had then sent him straight to his home via the floo connected to their home.

The fact that the floo had been open shocked him. Alex, like Severus, was somewhat paranoid and took strong precautions. The man was never one to leave the floo open for anyone to enter.

"Alex?" Severus shouted again through the house, walking through the hallways. Their home was a one story with a basement. It wasn't too large though so it wasn't long before Severus was in their bedroom with a concerned look on his face.

Lying on the bed, empty, unblinking eyes staring up at the ceiling, was Alex. The man's hair was sweaty and limp. His face was ghostly pale. He was still in his robes and Severus wondered when had his husband changed his clothes last.

"Alex?" He reached out, almost afraid that his husband was cold and dead from the look of him but a rush of relief went through him as he felt the warm skin. "Alexius?" Severus shook his husband's shoulder. He leaned over him, hoping to catch Alex's vacant eyes.

When he didn't receive a response, Severus climbed into the bed and straddle his husband. He began gently slapping Alexius, hoping that the younger man would come out of whatever comatose state that he was in before Severus was forced to become more violent.

Alex blinked and his eyes slowly began coming into focus. Severus in turn went still. Alex could be violent when startled. He had never done it toward Severus, but the potions master decided to be careful. He didn't forget the poor idiot that had shocked Alexius by bursting angrily into his husband's office. It was a good thing the man didn't try to press charges, especially since the aurors decided that the fool had it coming.

"It's stopped."

Severus's brow furrowed. "Stopped? Alex, what are you talking about? What happened?" He briefly wondered if Alex had seen a boggart.

"No. The crying has stopped." He smiled weakly and Severus was unnerved to see a shaky hand rise and brush the potion master's left cheek. "This happens every Halloween. No matter where I go, he follows."

"Alex, what are you saying? Who is crying?"

"It comes from the nursery." Alex's eyes welled up with tears before he curled up onto his side and cried silently.

Severus was utterly confused but saw that his husband was not ready to talk about anything yet. Pulling out his wand, he used a light charm to push Alex into sleep. There were heavy bags beneath his husband's eyes. /He's exhausted./

Standing with a sigh, Severus covered Alex with a light blanket. /The crying is from the nursery. _"No matter where I go, he follows."_/ Severus had an idea of what Alex was talking about.

His husband had never fully recovered from Nathanial's death. The baby had, as Alex put it, been one of the few things that had kept him connected after the fiasco with his wife. Alex had went on to say that he didn't remember a lot in the days after the death of Nathan and his lover.

_"My friends told me that I was different. I tried to get them to give me more information, but they refused to say anything. Personally, I don't think it mattered in the few days after. It was after the few days that I really changed."_

Severus pushed the words from his mind. It was something that he always hesitated to contemplate. Glancing at Alex once more, he turned and left the bedroom, walking out into the hall.

/Nursery? But there is no nursery. I know Alex wouldn't have had one./ Staring at the simple painting in front of him of an unidentified vineyard, Severus wondered if the former owners had a nursery.

Sighing, the potions master headed started down the hallway, wondering how to help his spouse.

TBC

Alia: Yeah, still short but you guys need to read this and the next part. As for the mpreg...I'm leaning towards none at all. I just don't know what I should do for Alex right now and I don't know if mpreg would fit in this story. (shrugs) REVIEW!!!


	8. Chapter 8

Alia: Okay people. I got good news and bad news. Good news, I updated. Bad news. NO MPREG. Yes I know. A complete contradiction for me (and the story title) but the story wouldn't work well with mpreg. However for those that wish to see Sev and Alex happy with the stampeding of little feet don't fear. I have some planned, but it won't be till the VERY end. Until then, enjoy.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

It didn't take long for Severus to realize that whatever Alexius was going through, his husband wasn't alone anymore. Severus also learned that he had to do something to help.

It had been late afternoon. Severus was in his basement lab checking on his stores. Alex slept silently, momentarily recovering from the demons plaguing him. Severus had dinner cooking slowly in the kitchen so that it would be ready by the time Alexius finally woke up.

So when the crying started again, Severus was the only one that heard it.

Severus froze in shock, unable to believe for a moment that Alex had actually been right. There didn't appear to be a way for the dark haired wizard to contradict his younger husband, however, as the cries of an infant continued, easily penetrating the thick walls of their basement.

Putting down the jar of dried snake tongues before he dropped it, Severus turned hesitantly toward the small stairs and headed for the first floor. Although he didn't want to, the potions master knew that he had to investigate whatever was bothering his husband.

/But I have to be insane to really think it's Nathaniel. Alex didn't move here until years after the baby's death./ But as the crying grew louder, Severus grew more worried.

Little Nathan had been killed with the killing curse. Deaths like that prevented the ghosts from returning to haunt the living, so how was it possible that the infant-?

Severus shook himself. /It can't possibly be him. Another ghost?/ Severus knew for a fact that there was no one in the house but him and Alex. Perhaps it was a former resident of the house.

Nodding at the most logical idea that his mind had found, Severus stopped his short walk in front of the small library that he had claimed after moving in with Alex. After receiving a raised eyebrow and a harsh remark about the appearance of his former residence, Severus had wanted some compensation for selling Spinner's End.

Opening the door, Severus immediately began surveying every inch of the room as the crying grew louder. /So it's coming from here, but I don't understand how-/ Mentally, Severus's thoughts stopped suddenly as the potions master stared in front of him.

The room was simple. There was a black sofa, two large wingback chairs in a deep burgundy, and a heavy wood table that stood before a fireplace with a small fire. A wooden chair sat in the corner beside a small round table with tall legs. There were no pictures or windows in the room. All the walls were covered from top to bottom with strong shelves and each shelf was packed with books.

Everything was in its place, from the small clock on the mantle of the fireplace to the small stack of potions magazines on the round table in the corner. What wasn't usual was the small head covered with soft hair that Severus could see just over the back of the sofa.

/Oh Merlin./ The head was certainly too small to be an adult and Severus knew for a fact that it had to be a child. /It's not possible. At least it shouldn't be./ But if this were really happening it was no wonder to Severus that his husband was a complete mess.

With clear hesitation, Severus stepped closer to the sofa where the ghostly figure of a child sat. /Perhaps it isn't Nathaniel./ Severus thought as he reminded himself of how Nathan had died. /It could be a former resident./

Severus began mentally picturing the only photograph his husband had of his dead child that sat face down on Alex's nightstand. Taking a deep breath, Severus peered over the back of the large piece of furniture. A teary eyed face looked up to him and showed him something he did not expect to see.

* * *

_"I still can't understand why."_

_"Then you're an -,"_

_"That's not what I meant!" he snapped before the insult was spoken. "I mean we both know that there are plenty of alternatives. So why?"_

_Dark eyes looked at him. "Normality."_

* * *

Alexius's head snapped up from the round, maple kitchen table as Severus slammed a heavy tomb down a few inches from his husband's head. The short haired man glared. "You're nicer to me when you knew I had a hangover." 

"Alexius, I do not have time for your nonsense this morning."

"Is that why you're being so mean to me?" Alex shook his head and mumbled about Severus making breakfast.

The potions master observed his husband as the man dropped his head back into his arms. His hair flying in every direction, Alexius still appeared to be better than he was the evening before. His eyes weren't quite as haunted and there was more color in his face. /Let me hope that he'll be able to handle this./

"I need you to read something." Severus opened the heavy, old book and began flipping through the pages, trying to find what he was looking for.

"Why? It's too early! My eyes haven't focused yet." The words came out clear yet muffled. Alex hadn't raised his head.

"Alex, will you stop acting like a five year old and read this," he growled impatiently. Severus pushed the book toward the other man.

"What can it possibly be that is so damn important?" Alex snapped as he sat back in his chair.

"I saw Nathan last night." Severus fought the impulse to bite his lip when Alex froze in his chair.

"What?" he said evenly, but Severus knew he was stunned. Alex was clenching his fists tightly.

"You told me you hear crying last night before you went to sleep. I didn't believe you until I heard it."

Alex leaped to his feet, knocking back his chair and surprising Severus. Not realizing that he was causing the potions master a small amount of fear when his wild eyed husband grabbed his upper arms, the pub owner pulled his husband close to look into his eyes. The only thing that prevented Severus from an instinctive struggle was the fact that Alex didn't put any pressure on his arms.

"Heard it? What do you mean you 'heard it'?" Alex stopped himself from shaking Severus, worried that he would anger or hurt his husband. But he found himself scared, wondering if his yearly madness had somehow infected Severus. It was an insane thought, Alex knew, but something that wouldn't leave him.

"I heard a baby crying last night after you went to sleep." Severus stared his terrified husband in the eyes. "It surprised me so I decided to investigate." Severus gently nudged his husband back into his seat. Alex released Severus as he continued staring up at the older wizard.

"It was coming from the library. I went in and I saw a baby, a ghost, sitting on the couch. I saw him, Alex. It really was Nathanial."

Pure anguish was displayed over his lover's face as he slowly shook his head. But concern grasped Severus's attention when he noticed that the pain was disappearing and that Alexius' face was totally blank. It was only a few moments before his husband's face transformed and left him with empty holes for eyes.

"Alex?" Severus said softly.

Alex clasped his hands together on the table as he turned in his chair to face to furniture properly.

"Alex?" Severus said more insistently.

The younger wizard closed his eyes. "That's not true. It's not true."

"I would not lie to you about something like this, Alex."

"It can't be true," he whispered stonily. "I'm mad. I know that and I know damn well that madness can't spread like some STD. So it can't be true. You couldn't have seen him."

Scowling with worry at his husband, Severus pushed the book before him and pointed at a passage. "You aren't insane, Alexius! No matter how much you wish to believe it." Severus stared at him. "At least try to read it, Alex," said Severus as the man turned his head away from him.

Alex gave an explosive sigh before turning to the book. Severus sat down in the chair perpendicular to his husband's right as Alex read silently.

It was a few minutes before Alex raised his head. He had read the passage at least twice. "So, I'm not insane?" he whispered with an almost reluctant hope.

"No. Nathan was, no, is your son, Alex. He has a connection with you that neither of you want to let go of. Because of that, he revisits you every Hallows Eve when it's time for some spirits to return."

It had been the only real explanation that Severus could find. And with the way the small child was crying for his daddy, Severus knew he was right. Somehow the father-son connection the two had allowed the baby to visit his father at least once a year.

"So what does this mean?" Dark green eyes began to fill with concern. "Is this hurting him? Is he in danger?"

"No. He's fine. He is simply...visiting."

"But he shouldn't be here." Alex closed the book, looking terribly sad. "Next Halloween? We break the connection?"

"If you wish." Severus wasn't sure it was a good idea but knew that Alex couldn't take going through another Halloween like yesterday.

The kitchen was silent for a while as both men stared at the book. "I hope...I wonder..." Alex shook his head. /It shouldn't be possible. Not here./ Taking a deep breath, he looked at his husband. "Maybe he'll be reborn. Hopefully into a good family this time."

Severus gave his husband a long assessing look as he wondered if Alexius was trying to tell him something. He stood. "I'll fix breakfast."

* * *

(Alia: I'm gonna be nice and add more. Be happy and dance around in your chair for a minute. I won't tell.)

* * *

_"So you hate him?"_

_"Not necessarily. He is still my enemy but at the same time someone I...trust. Although not much."_

_He laughed. "I understand that only too well."_

_"Oh?"_

* * *

"Psst! Severus!" 

Pausing with a look of annoyed confusion on his face, Severus turned around in a stiff circle, looking for whoever had called him. An raised eyebrow was all his husband received when Severus noticed him.

Alex grinned at him from around the corner of the corridor motioning him over frantically as he hid the rest of his body from Severus's view. "Come with me."

"Alexius, what the bloody hell are you doing here?" Severus asked slightly amused.

It was Yule and the majority of the students were gone home for the holidays leaving only a few older students and the professors behind. Severus had planned to leave for Greece since all of his snakes were home for the holidays. He wasn't going for a couple more days, however.

"What? I can't surprise my husband?" He said with a smirk.

Severus snorted at him in disbelief. "You actually expect me to believe that?"

Alex's smirk grew. "You're so suspicious, Severus! Don't you trust me?"

Severus gave him a long look that illicited a snicker from the younger man. Mentally, the potions master sighed. /Merlin, help me. He's in another one of his moods./ But Severus had become accustomed to Alex's shifty behavior.

"Now come on. We have some holiday shopping to do."

"Shopping?" Severus asked flatly. He couldn't remember planning to shop for anyone. Severus couldn't even be sure that he was shopping for Alex. He walked toward his husband.

Alex nodded solemnly. The smile on his face remained. "Oh yes. Little trinkets for my employees and your colleagues. Everyone's behaved so well about the sudden marriage thing that I thought we'd reward them."

Severus took the hand Alex offered him as he rounded the corner where his husband was standing. What he didn't expect was for Alex to push him into the wall, albeit gently, and kiss him.

With Alexius' hands and forearms braced beside Severus's shoulders and the potions master's arms pinned against the wizard's chest, Severus found that he was unable to move himself from his husband's embrace. The smirk on Alex's face showed that he knew it exactly.

"Alexius Agath-," Severus's scolding was cut early by another kiss from Alex.

But while the older wizard didn't mind kissing his spouse, they rarely used public displays of affection as neither liked it. So in fear that one of his students or colleagues, the last people in the world that Severus wanted to stumble over them, Severus tried squirming out of his husband's arms. Alex, however, only held on by wrapping his arms around Severus completely, allowing one hand to drop down and give Severus's arse a quick squeeze.

Starting with a gasp, Severus blinked in surprise as his lips were abandoned for his neck. "Alex!" he whispered as his eyes darted around them.

Alex responded with a put out sigh against Severus's skin before abruptly releasing his husband. Only Severus's natural grace kept him from stumbling. "Severus, I haven't seen you in well over a month and you expect us to spend the day together innocently?" Alex snorted and started down the hall, leaving his aggravated husband to follow.

* * *

By the time they'd walked into Hogsmeade, Alex had Severus speaking to him again, but in a much kinder manner. To say that the potions master had been unpleasant would be an understatement. Alex was grateful that his better half was such a forgiving man. At least where Alex was concerned. At least most of the time. 

"So where do we start? I don't know all of Hogsmeade," said Alex as he looked around. The village appeared to have more people moving about than Alex's last visit but with it being so close to Yule, he understood.

Severus stared out into the village with a contemplative look as he made certain his black cloak and scarf kept most of his body covered from the cold, winter air. Alex was also warmly dressed, but had put aside his usual white for a deep gray. His robes and cloak were still the same cut; Alex always had his throat covered. People simply asked too many questions.

"I suppose going to Honeydukes would be enough?" asked Severus, who tried not too place too much hope in his voice.

Alex glanced at him. "It would be a good idea. But don't you want to add a personal touch to them?"

"Perhaps a few." Severus thought of his colleagues. No matter how annoying they all were, they considered him their friends and always sent him gifts. Severus's usual gift to the majority of them were hangover potions. "Do you intend to do the same?"

Alex scoffed. "My employees can go to hell for all I care. I thought doing something nice like this would make them a little less..." Alex shook his head, unable to find a word for them. "For cook, I might find something. The old battle axe deserves something for putting up with the others."

Severus merely nodded and wondered if his husband realized that despite the woman's temper, Alex was fond of her. Severus had a feeling that it was also vice versa although both would jump to their deaths before they would admit it. Especially to each other.

"So let go to Honeydukes now. We can decide where else to go later."

The two men continued into the village slowly, Alexius keeping only enough distance to be appropriate. It didn't stop him from occasionally bumping his hand into his husband's and staying close enough to let people know they'd entered Hogsmeade together.

A few curious glances were thrown their way, one or two thrown hostily in Severus's direction, but none of the looks were given any attention. Severus and Alex had begun talking about the local government in Greece and how a local political issue was turning out.

"They're lacking any type of real understanding about the issues, Severus. They aren't seeing everything from all sides."

"Many don't," replied the potions master. "And they make decision before gaining all the facts. All countries are like that, Alex. It's one of the problems that come with the majority. Most of the time, the majority is too stupid to see what is in front of them. Take the incidents in the States for example." (Alia: No this isn't a reference to anything really happening in the US.)

Alex nodded. "Or here in Great Britain. It's amazing that Fudge is BACK in office. I mean how is that possible?" Alex exclaimed. "The man is...not the brightest among us."

"The Ministry is cursed, Alex. I thought you knew." Severus slowed as they came upon Honeydukes.

Alex rolled his eyes. "Oh very funny, Severus." He watched his husband smirk at him. Alex frowned. "It's not really cursed is it?"

"Alex, hurry so we can finish."

"Severus, please tell me the Ministry isn't really cursed." Not receiving an answer, Alex cursed softly and quickly followed his husband into the sweets store. He mock sighed with despondence. "You're always teasing me. I feel incredibly stupid around you sometimes."

"Only sometimes?" asked Severus, who was quick to pass the register and go further into the store. Alex barely kept up to the older wizard. "I'll have to work on that."

"There is that teasing again," Alex hissed with a small smile as they continued looking through the sweets. Alex began picking random products.

"Consider that a part of the revenge I own you for earlier." Severus grimaced at a particular sweet that he personally considered vile and wondered if it would work for his colleagues. He knew at least three hated it.

"You act as if I committed some unforgiveable sin!"

Severus raised an eyebrow as Alex tried to look innocent. "It doesn't work with me. You need more practice."

"This could be considered spousal abuse!" declared Alex as he tried to stop his grin. Severus couldn't quite hold back his snort of amusement. Alex looked rather smug at that, silently saying that he had won.

Severus decided to be the better man and walk away with a smirk firmly on his face. Alex wished he was younger. If he'd started skipping, he wouldn't look weird.

The couple continued looking through the various sweets and were slowly making their way back to the front of the shop. Alex had many different things in his arms. He'd picked anything that caught his eye. The wizard didn't appear to care what they were or what they tasted like.

Severus had chosen a few things he'd known his colleagues favored although he'd purposely chosen something different for Albus.

Alex had spotted a sweet called 'dragon drops'. "Sounds a bit strange doesn't it?" he asked Severus as the potions master peered over his husband's shoulder. Alexius picked one up and looked at it.

"It looks like one of Albus's lemon drops," Severus grimaced at the thought of the sweets. Albus was one of the two members on staff that enjoyed the disgusting things.

"True, but maybe these are strawberry. Look. They're all red." He sniffed one then grimaced. "Damn. These are hot."

"Excuse me?" Severus asked confused.

"They're called dragon drops because they are those really hot tasting sweets. This will probably burn your tongue off!"

Severus paused and stared at the sweets. "Get a bag."

"What for?" asked Alex. He watched with furrowed eyebrows as Severus picked up a regular bag of lemon drops.

The potions master smirked and took the bag from his husband. "These are for Albus." He started down the aisle again.

"Yes, but he won't like those. I doubt he'd even try them."

"He will if he thinks they're strawberry." Alex had stared at his husband before bursting into laughter, startling the cashier.

It wasn't long before Severus was sick of the shop and the sweets and was trying to pull Alex away from the chocolate frogs. Apparently the younger man had a great fondness for the treat.

"Do you really need that many?" he snapped impatiently.

Alex shrugged. "It brings back some good childhood memories. Besides, they've started filling them with different kinds of cremes lately." He handed Severus two. "Try those later. You'll like them. I promise."

Sighing, Severus plucked the treats from his husband's hand and headed toward the front of the shop to pay for his choices. Alex followed behind quickly, juggling his purchases and the gifts for his staff.

"Do you think I should wrap them? I know a spell that will do it easily."

Severus paused and nodded. "At least your employees will think it took some effort. They may think better of you."

"Why wouldn't they think better of me already?" asked Alex, honestly confused.

"You mean with you throwing curses at them on a daily basis?" Severus said with a smirk. Alex coughed with amusement.

"Severus?"

The potions master stilled as he recognized the voice. Alex also stiffened as he stared at his husband's face. Emotions were moving as smoothly as water over Severus's features before becoming completely blank. /Not good./

Alex turned his head toward the cashier with a fake, but easily believable, smile as the man began pricing their purchases. However, Alexius wasn't paying any attention to the cashier's actions but to what was happening next to him.

Out of the corner of his eyes, Alex could see a somewhat pale looking man standing at the door. He didn't look like he was in the finest state of health but he was did look well. The sandy haired man was staring at Severus with a bit of shock on his face as the potions master gave him an expressionless look in return.

The man never took his amber eyes off of Severus as he shifted uncomfortably under his thick robes. He cleared his throat and tried to call up a pleasant smile. Even with peripheral vision, Alex could see that the man only half succeeded. "Hello, Severus."

"Lupin," The dark clothed man replied. His voice sounded empty and cold but Alex sensed anger in Severus's voice.

Alex quickly paid for his items, turned his body fully toward the two men. Not totally sure of everything he saw in Lupin's eyes, Alex placed his right hand along Severus's lower back. "Severus?" he asked worriedly.

Severus could see Lupin's eyes widen in surprise at Alex's rather blatant claim. Apparently the werewolf was smart enough to know that the two men must be rather close. Especially seeing that Severus had yet to hex Alexius. Had Alex dropped his hand any lower as he had earlier, Severus would have.

"Is everything alright?" Alex asked as if he couldn't see perfectly well what was happening. Severus knew exactly what his husband was doing.

Severus turned away from Lupin to look at Alex. Raising the hand that held his plain, silver wedding ring, Severus took their packages from the store clerk. "I'm fine, Alex." He glanced back to see the absolutely stunned expression on Lupin's face.

The Hogwarts professor rarely wore his wedding ring as he feared damaging it while working with his experiments and classes. It was usually kept in his pockets. Severus had only worn it today because classes were over and he and Alex were headed into the village.

"So are we ready to go?" Alex made sure to look at Lupin with confusion. He knew perfectly well who the man was and Alexius wasn't happy with him at all.

Severus nodded and the men walked toward Lupin. Stopping in front of the former DADA professor, Severus raised an eyebrow and stared at him coldly. Alex smiled but didn't hide the hint of steel in his eyes. "Excuse us." The younger man stated politely.

Remus started out of whatever world his mind had been lost to as he took in the obviously married couple in front of him. "Of course! My apologies." He didn't move, however. He couldn't force himself to.

Severus glared at Lupin as he stretched out a right hand to Alex. "Remus Lupin."

Alex gave him a stiff smile. "Alexius Agathon. Now if you'll excuse us, Mr. Lupin, we really must be going."

"Well," Remus started. He didn't know why but he was suddenly desperate to find out more information. He needed to know who this man was and if he was actually Severus's husband as the matching rings indicated. Because Remus didn't know how to feel about that.

"Lupin, get the bloody hell out of the way," Severus snapped rudely, "before I make you get out of the way."

Realizing that Severus was more than willing to do such a thing, especially after Remus's part in past matters, he quickly stepped out of the way. Alex and Severus past the werewolf without so much as a nod of acknowledgment.

* * *

"So it's true?" Remus asked Albus as he stood in the Headmaster's office. 

As usual, Albus had been happy to see his former employee even though the last time the two men had been in the same area, it hadn't been for pleasantries. Remus had been worried that Albus would be displeased with him for taking the stance he had on Severus and Harry's relationship, but Dumbledore acted as if nothing had happened.

Good thing because Remus wanted information about Snape and Agathon. And he had plenty of questions to ask. One of which Dumbledore had answered.

"Oh yes," Albus said with a smile as he waved a surprised Remus into a chair in front of his desk. "They haven't been married very long. About six or seven months now. I'm not exactly sure when. Severus and Alex are rather tight lipped about their marriage." Albus shook his head with a light exasperation. "All that I know is that they met in Greece during a potions conference."

"He's a potions master?" asked Remus.

"Oh no! Alexius owns a restaurant in Greece. Apparently he and Severus shared a table one night and the rest is history." Albus chuckled as he remembered the teasing Severus had gone through after breaking the news.

"I see. They met," Remus quickly calculated the time. "In June, I suppose." Albus nodded. "That seems a bit soon for marriage. And Severus is not the impulsive kind."

"I must say that it surprised all of us when Severus told us he had married over the summer."

"You didn't get invited to the wedding?" asked Remus who was once again surprised. Then he shook his head. "Oh right. You didn't even know. So what do you think of Agathon?"

"Alexius is a very pleasant man mostly," Albus adding the last in remembrance of his unsettling talk with Alex. "I do not know him very well, but I can see that he and Severus are good for each other. They seem to know each other very well. It's not something you often see with people who have known each other for such a short time."

"It still amazes me that the two of them are together."

"You mean so soon after Severus and young Mr. Potter ended their relationship," Albus said inquiringly.

Remus, however, managed to hear something in the Headmaster's voice that told him that Dumbledore had not forgotten how the situation had come to a head and how it had all ended. He especially hadn't forgotten who was involved.

"Um..." The werewolf found himself a bit speechless for a moment. "Yes, I suppose that's what I mean."

"That is true, but I've seen them, Remus." Albus paused to sip his tea and gaze into nothing. "They love each other very much."

Seeing that Albus didn't know much himself, Remus left after a lemon drop and some tea thinking/What am I going to tell Harry?/

TBC

Alia: Now I'm happy everyone hopefully likes this even with the bad news. Now REVIEW!!!


	9. Chapter 9

Alia: (sings) It's been a while. Since...um...I don't remember the rest of the song right now. But hey, new part right?! (see glares) Oh come on! I'm doing good! I'm getting over my depression (which is still rather embarrassing to admit) and I'm branching out into new and better things. I even got a new HP mpreg coming up. I have to write two more chapters before I put it on FF. It's on my livejournal though (the addy is on my profile).

I am sorry I didn't update though. My life just...wasn't of the good. At least to me which explains the depression. But I'm writing now and that's all that matters (even if things aren't totally resolved).

I had issues with getting this out, not because I painted myself into a corner (like with Second Chances and my other fics). But because I had a hard time getting the motivation. And to think I still want to write Dark Lord's Shade. Oh well. But I'm writing and my love for this story and all things Alex/Sev is still going. So yay.

Now read and REVIEW. It helps, believe you me.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

* * *

_"I never wanted to admit it, but there are so many times in my life that I felt like giving up. I wanted to fall apart and be left alone. I wanted to be happy even in my madness."_

_"But you never did."_

_"No."_

_"Not even now?"_

_"Why bother? I've put it all behind me."_

_"...It's nice that you actually believe you can put something like that behind you."

* * *

_

Alex buried his head in his hands and wondered if he was truly that desperate. /I mean, I still have time! I can find something./ But he knew he was only lying to himself. Alex wasn't nearly as optimistic as he wanted to be. If he hadn't come up with an idea by now, Alex knew he wouldn't be able to think of anything.

Lifting his head, his face showing his anxiety, Alex stared at the calendar in his office. "I knew I shouldn't have marked it, but he actually has mine marked! Shit!" Alex dropped his head roughly onto his desk.

He groaned. "I don't want to ask that old woman!" He kicked his feet wildly beneath his desk like an angry toddler. "That old battle axe won't make this easy for me at all!"

Cook took absolutely every opportunity she had to comment on Alex's poor skills as a husband. No matter what was happening or what he had done, it always received some sort of criticism by the gray haired old biddy. It was always one thing or another. Like how he and Severus celebrated Yule.

The two men had stayed at home most of the holiday after Severus had arrived from Hogwarts. They rarely left their home except to shop for dinner and potion ingredients. Alex had even resorted to calling the pub from their house as well.

Most of Christmas was spent in their library where after they'd exchanged gifts, Severus read while Alex tried to get his new television running. The potions master had actually gone to the trouble to buy Alex one. Alex honestly didn't think it was from the kindness of his husband's heart. It was more that Alex always complained about not having one around the house.

Severus had stopped a few times to watch his husband curse with frustration and offer small tidbits of advice. Both men had one muggle parent so trying to get a television set up shouldn't have been as difficult as it was. Severus had suggested Alex give up only to be ignored by the stubborn restaurant owner. It took most of Christmas day but Alex managed to get it working.

It had been a pleasant holiday alone with his husband. Of course Cook didn't see it that way. The minute he'd stepped into his own damned pub the woman had blasted him for hiding his husband away for the holiday, claiming that he was ashamed of Severus. That had led to a very entertaining lunch for his customers with him and Cook screaming at each other for the better part of two hours in the kitchen.

Alex leaned back in his chair and sighed, dropping his arms along the sides of his comfortable chair. "Damn it. What can I get? Books and clothing are out."

Christmas presents hadn't been really difficult. He'd simply gone to the night market that he and Severus had frequented during their short dating period and found the potions master a rare text on illegal potion ingredients. He'd also bought his husband a new black cloak with silver embroidery.

If he even tried to repeat his gift giving, which he didn't plan to do anyway, Severus would give him this smirk that would annoy the hell out of Alex and mention the repetition. Cook...well that was the problem now wasn't it?

Since the first day he'd hired the old buzzard, she'd been butting into his life constantly. There were days Alex was sure he couldn't go to the bathroom without her making sure everything was working properly. If he heard the word fiber one more time...

Cook had taken a large part in his and Severus's marriage. And if Alex wanted to be totally honest, she was the reason he and Severus even married.

After seeing how Severus was one of the few he didn't send running in the other direction with his bad attitude, Cook had started pushing him in the potions master's direction. She had been impressed that Severus had stood up to all the garbage she claimed Alex spouted on a daily basis.

Alex had been pissed to no end to find himself standing in one of the conference rooms at the potions convention just to apologize for his behavior and offer Severus a free meal. But he and Severus had gotten along much better the next time the two had met. And as Cook backed off, he and Severus had slowly become friendly acquaintances over the next two weeks. At least until the old badger thought they were made for each other.

Alex didn't care what Severus believed, he knew damn well that old crow had been the one to get them drunk. Before that night, she was constantly mentioning Severus in passing and was slowly driving Alex to distraction by her implications. He hadn't wanted any type of relationship except for friendship with the dark potions master.

But Cook was a determined woman and extremely sneaky. She and his bartender were the only ones that knew which of his wines were the most potent and which was not to be given to Alex. Last time he'd had that certain wine, he and an auror friend of his had started a brawl in Alex's pub with a couple rowdy customers.

Thankfully, there was no fighting when he and Severus had gotten drunk inside the small restaurant. And after Cook had tossed the two men through the floo to Alex's home, there still hadn't been any fighting. Unfortunately, Alex and Severus had spilled their guts to each other despite the fact that there wasn't any type of truth potion in the wine. Alex was only grateful that he'd still had enough sense not to tell Severus absolutely everything.

Then the two drunken men had decided to get married. And in this, Severus couldn't argue much. Cook's husband was certified for marriages. She had to have had something to do with what had happened. It was only too bad that when he and Severus had woken the next morning that she wasn't around to curse.

Alex scratched his head and stared at the calendar again. As reluctant as he was, Alex had to admit that Cook was a big help in the marriage Alex knew she had wanted. His marriage wouldn't have lasted the day if it weren't for the specific marriage bond her husband had used.

It was something like a mental bond. It was weak and was used only to help the couple understand each other's actions, emotions, and thoughts better. Alex felt the weak bond fade entirely nearly two months ago, but he and Severus still got along quite well.

He groaned. "Damn. This means I have to ask the old woman."

Buying Severus a Christmas gift wasn't bad. So why was getting his husband a birthday present so damn difficult?

"Who are you calling old, boy?" sneered the gray haired woman as she opened his office door.

Alex glowered. "What did I say about waltzing into my office woman!" roared Alex.

It drove him insane when people invaded his privacy so thoughtlessly. That was the very reason Alex started throwing hexes and curses at his employees. Alex often wanted to be alone for whatever reason he had that day. He was sick of idiots coming from left and right disturbing him every chance they got. Severus was the only person other than Cook that tried something like that, but Severus was his husband unlike the busybody standing in his office. Severus also respected his privacy. Again unlike a certain old bitty that was standing before him.

Cook snorted and took a seat, wiping her wet hands on her dirty apron. "Your husband isn't here so I don't need to worry about walking in on anything." Alex started grinding his teeth. It had happened before. Thankfully they'd only been kissing. "And I've never listened to a word you've said boy."

"Do I look like a boy to you, woman?" Alex snapped with a cold look.

Cook stared back at him even, not in the least bit afraid. She was silently telling him that he was acting like a spoiled brat. She smirked triumphantly when Alex looked away first. She folded her arms. "What are you doing in here hiding? Do you know what those idiots out there are doing?"

"It can't be that bad," muttered Alex as he thought about what gift he could possibly give Severus.

"Lysander dropped a bottle of Merlot '92."

"I'll kill him."

"Don't bother. The boy is trying to heal that bruise on his head."

Alex suddenly looked amused. "I see your pot was aiming true this morning."

"Of course," Cook snorted. Her eyes narrowed. "Now what are you doing back here? I can see you aren't actually working." She gave him a look of disapproval that Alex easily brushed off.

Hesitating for a moment, Alexius spoke. "I'm trying to think of a gift for Severus. His birthday is in a few days."

Cook tsked at him, drawing an annoyed look from Alex. "Honestly. Been married for months now,"

"With unwelcome help," snapped Alex. He was ignored.

"And you don't even know what to get him as a gift." She shook her head. "Has he asked for anything?"

Alex scoffed. "Severus isn't the type to celebrate his birthday, much less ask for anything. I can't wait to see the look on his face tomorrow when the staff has that small party for him."

"Do you know if he wants anything specific?" Cook asked thoughtfully.

Alex shook his head. "Nothing that immediately comes to mind."

"Has he complained about anything? Maybe you could figure out a way to help."

He tilted his head. "Actually...The last time he was home, he was complaining about his lab. We haven't had time to get the walls reinforced. And sometimes he needs more light then he has to read. He can't have too much because they might damage the ingredients on the walls. And-,"

"There you have it," Cook said quickly as she stood. "Fix up his lab for him and solve his problems."

"He'll kill me if I harm his lab," Alexius protested.

"Then I suggest you do it right. Now get some work done!" With that the heavy set woman stormed out of the room.

Alex glared. "Old, psychotic battleaxe!"

* * *

Albus leaned over into Minerva. "Is everything ready?" he whispered eagerly. 

Minerva smiled at him indulgently. "Yes, Albus. Everything is ready. We simply need to get Severus to the lounge and wait for Alexius to arrive."

Albus nodded. "I'm sure Severus will enjoy the party that we have planned for him."

Minerva smiled. Severus hated celebrating his birthday, unlike the rest of the staff. He often tried to barricade himself in his rooms only to have Albus drag him out to join the celebration. One year, Severus even set traps for Albus when the older wizard tried to come for him. It was very entertaining to see Severus carry a miniaturized Headmaster to the teachers' lounge.

"We'll see. Perhaps he'll be more forth coming this year with Alexius attending. When is he arriving?"

"This afternoon," Albus replied. "He said he had a couple matters to take care of before he arrived. Are the prefects ready?"

"Yes. They'll watch for the students while we're celebrating. I also," Minerva paused to watch the owls arrive. A small look of displeasure crossed her face. "Told them that if necessary, they were to report to Sybil for help since she will not be attending." It was actually more of Severus forbidding the woman from attending his party.

Albus nodded, pleased that the students would be under some control while their professors were occupied.

"What kind of cake did you ask the house elves for? You know Severus isn't a fan of large amounts of chocolate. He barely ate his slice last year, even with Harry's urging."

"True." Albus smiled mischievously. "The cake is a simple vanilla."

Minerva caught the twinkle in Albus's eye and narrowed her own at him. "And?" she said, stretching the word slightly. The Daily Prophet was dropped in front of her. Minerva wrinkled her nose at the paper. Most of it was utter rubbish. She didn't know why she subscribed to it.

"It may be in the shape a cauldron," said Albus sheepishly. As Flitwick silently stole Minerva's paper, something he often did, Dumbledore cleared his throat. "And the icing might be chocolate and there may be fresh raspberries on top."

Minerva stared at him before shaking her head with an amused smile. "What are we going to do with you, Albus Dumbledore?"

"Oh come now! It sounds delicious and Severus loves raspberries. Besides, it wasn't my idea," he said defending himself.

"What do you mean?" she asked. "Who's idea was it then?"

"Alexius." Minerva chuckled as he went on. "Now Severus will be certain to enjoy it."

"Poor Severus! Having to deal with the two of you!"

"Albus! Minerva!" Filius insistently waved his stolen paper in front of the couple. "Look! I can't believe them! They had to have known something like this would be in the paper today!"

"What is it, Filius?" Albus asked with concern. Minerva took the paper from the small professor so that she and Albus could read it.

Minerva immediately went red upon reading the headline. "I do not believe that boy!" The transfiguration professor practically snarled. "He knows perfectly well what today is and he-,"

"Married Ginerva Weasley on Severus's birthday." Dumbledore looked at the couple in the picture surrounded by close family and friends. The entire Weasley family, Remus Lupin, and Hermione Granger all stood around Harry and Ginerva Potter.

"Why today of all days?" Minerva asked herself. "No wonder Hermione looked so unhappy about the party today." The young professor had left the evening before because she had a family event to attend. No one had realized she was preparing for Harry's wedding the next morning.

Albus sported a small frown on his face before standing. "I think that I should make sure Severus is prepared for the party today."

McGonagal and Flitwick were only momentarily stunned at the Headmaster's abrupt before they quickly alerted the rest of staff of what they'd discovered.

* * *

"He's left already?" asked Severus surprised. He knew Alexius was coming for his birthday party in the teachers' lounge.

Cook shook her head. "That husband of yours hasn't even come into work today. He hasn't been here for the last three days!"

Severus had a confused expression on his face. "I don't understand. Alexius isn't the type to forget about work. Do you think he's been ill?"

"I doubt it. He'd have come in regardless. Probably got dragged into something by the Ministry again since those friends of his are still gone." Cook muttered something unflattering under her breath.

Severus thought about it before nodding hesitantly. More than once had Alexius returned to the Grecian Ministry because they begged for some sort of assistance. He had done it even during the summer, not a month after he and Severus married. And even though Alex claimed to hate the work, he never put up much resistance when the Ministry called.

"I heard it's your birthday, however. I'll be sure to send you that dish you like so much." Before Severus could thank her in reply, Cook ended the connection.

Severus straightened and sighed. /No wonder that one drives my husband insane./ It might have been age that made her react that way but Severus couldn't be entirely sure. The potions master shrugged and walked toward his living room table to find the Daily Prophet. /But she doesn't treat me nearly as badly./

Cook actually seemed to like Severus and was rather kind, in her own way, to the potions master. They could talk for hours without her raising her voice or insulting him in any way. She always prepared a favorite dish of Severus's when he returned to Greece to see Alex. When it came to him she was her usual self but seemed to tone down.

She was completely different when it came to his husband, not that Severus minded too much. The two were a very entertaining sight once they got started. They would scream, shout, insult and curse each other for as long as they had the energy to do so.

Shaking his head, Severus sat down as a hurried knock was heard at the door. "Enter!" snapped the potions master as he reached for the paper. He glanced out of the corner of his eye to see Albus hurry inside.

The older man had a paper in his hand and looked a bit flushed. Severus wondered if Albus expected the usual traps to be in place again. "Severus-,"

The professor raised an eyebrow. "Aren't you a little early to be dragging me upstairs, Albus?" he asked with an amused voice.

"Severus, have you seen the Prophet yet?" Albus asked, trying to hide the emotion in his voice.

Severus heard the slight change in the Headmaster's voice despite that he tried to hide it. He looked sharply at Dumbledore and saw the worry in the old wizard's face. Frowning Severus turned to the table and read the front page that he had previously been unable to see after so many interruptions.

The large headline and the photo above the fold told Severus everything he needed to know, including why Albus had rushed down to his quarters with such a look of concern.

The dark haired wizard straightened, his suddenly tense body immediately pulling away from the source of his shock.

"Severus, my boy. I..." Albus paused not sure that any kind of apology from him would help. He watched as Severus's face slowly lost more of it's much needed color.

"Did you have any idea?" he asked.

Dumbledore shook his head. "None at all. I certainly would have forewarned you if I'd known."

Severus's eyes were filled with turmoil. Albus could easily categorize each emotion that rose and fell like tides over the younger wizard's face. Pain, disbelief, and familiar fury was visible. Albus recognized the same feelings in his own heart because while it wasn't happening to him, it was happening to someone very dear to him.

Silently, Severus closed his eyes and clasped his hands in his lap. His brow was crinkled and his lips were pressed tightly together. Albus narrowed his eyes slightly behind his glasses and could see that the deep breaths the potions master took were shaky despite the man's efforts to control them.

He silently cursed Harry and wondered just what the younger man was thinking. He knew Harry had to knew what today was, especially with Hermione as his best friend. Dumbledore was absolutely certain that she reminded him of the date's significance. /And yet he did this as well./ Albus sighed mentally. /Am I so surprised that he is this cruel? Especially after that day./ To be honest, Dumbledore was still somewhat surprised by Harry's behavior. It just was not something he expected of the young man.

"Severus?" Albus inquired hesitantly.

The man didn't look up, but spoke. "I'll join you in time for the party, Albus." The dark head dropped as Severus's voice cracked slightly on the Headmaster's name.

"Severus, will you be well?" Albus could see how much an affect the new information was having on his friend.

"Albus please just go away," Severus whispered softly, his voice clogging with emotion.

The Headmaster nodded. "Very well." Deciding not to mention the party, Dumbledore walked to the entrance of Severus's quarters and waited for the portrait to open. He paused at the doorway to watch his friend. After one last look he stepped out into the hall.

Albus found himself mentally cursing Harry Potter for the first time in his life. He glanced back at the portrait.

Although the man wasn't looking his way, he seemed to know that Albus was staring. The snake hissed towards the professor while the man shook his head. "Leave him be Dumbledore. He needs some time, then he'll be well again."

Dumbledore shook his head. "This is painful to him. It's very difficult to watch."

"It's not the first time you've seen him pained and did nothing." Albus winced at the curt response as images of Severus's schooling and spying flashed through his mind for a moment.

The man continued. "But he needs to get himself together and process this information. He's not nearly as hurt as he was before. He's stronger."

"And I agree with you." Because Severus had been destroyed after learning the truth. Harry had humiliated his lover for foolish reasons. As well as the fact that the boy had apparently lost his spine. "But I must do something." The portrait kept quiet as Albus came to an idea. "Perhaps I should call Alexius. I am sure he will want to know what is happening."

The man in the portrait, much to Dumbledore's surprise, moved. He sat up in the chair and turned to face the Headmaster. Cold blue eyes stared angrily at him while his snake coiled up, almost ready to strike out at the bearded wizard.

"Dumbledore, do not meddle in affairs that are not your own." The man practically snarled. Black hair shifted gently even with the restrained, yet violent movement of the man's head. "That boy is not ready to face his husband."

"Alexius would be the best source of-,"

"That damn well doesn't matter. If he sees his husband pulling away from him, Agathon will in turn pull away as well. And I assure you things may only escalate after that point. Do you wish to see their marriage destroyed?"

"You're exaggerating!" Albus exclaimed in surprise.

"Are you sure?" The Headmaster went silent. "Answer my question. Do you wish to see the end of this marriage? One of the few good things that has ever happened to the boy in those rooms."

"No."

"Then do not summon Alexius."

Albus and the blue eyed Slytherin stared at each other before Dumbledore turned and walked away. The old wizard said nothing as he headed to his office. He could after all only follow his gut and tell Alexius what had happened.

Dumbledore bit his lip in a childish manner as he hoped he wasn't making a mistake.

* * *

_"I can see why you reacted that way. Emotions can be dangerous. Look how I got married."_

_"That was different. Didn't you say you cared for her?"_

_"Yeah, but it was really pity. After all, her husband and children had been murdered."_

_"So you tried to be there to comfort her," he started._

_"And ended up in bed with her not too long afterward. I was a complete fool," the dark haired male admitted with a sigh.

* * *

_

Alex walked around the basement laboratory with a small smile on his face. The contractors that he'd hired were good. Very good. The workers had excellent experience with potion labs and Alex had to believe every word of it was true. They had done everything quickly and without any complications.

Alex smiled at the new lighting in the room happy that Severus would have a good amount of reading light. Instead of sunlight, soft ambient light radiated from an embedded lumos charm in smoothed orbs of crystal quartz. Thick mahogany wood shelves lined one long wall but left a small alcove between them. It led to the new room that housed more shelves and Severus's more dangerous materials.

Two new lab tables were made entirely of granite sat where the old, molded tables used to be. In the corner, things changed from the new black marble floor, to an emerald green marble where a new bathroom was. It was bare but for a small shower, toilet, sink and a small cabinet.

The married wizard nodded with approval as he turned in a circle, observing his husband's renovated domain. Everything that Alexius had asked for had been done. Now all he had to do was hope and pray that Severus didn't try to kill him for his actions.

"It shouldn't be too bad. After all, I didn't hurt anything." Alex couldn't stop himself from fidgeting nervously though. He knew his husband was sensitive when it came to his work. His work was different, but Alex was no less dedicated to his pub than Severus was to his potions.

"Agathon! Mr. Agathon!"

The good humor on Alex's face fell as he heard the voice of his newest employee, Cliantha. She was replacing her sister since the woman was now five months pregnant. Grumbling about idiots that couldn't cook or pour a damn drink, the dark haired man turned and headed quickly up the stairs. His white robes billowed slightly behind him in a way that would have made Severus smile had he been present.

The former auror scratched his head, yanking at his hair slightly, as Cliantha continued calling for him from his foyer area. /What the hell happened this time? These idiots are going to drive me crazy!/ Alex had grown used to working with confident, reliable people that could take care of themselves. He wasn't used to working with idiots even with his leader experience.

"Cliantha."

The girl, who had been pacing back and forth at his front door, picking at her purple winter robes, jumped as her employer came walking around the corner. She squirmed after catching the look on his face. He certainly didn't look happy to see her. He really wasn't going to be pleased to hear the information Cook had sent her there with. "Mr. Agathon."

"What are you doing here?" asked Alex, crossing his arms. His employees didn't know where he lived.

"Cook sent me, sir. There was a message from Hogwarts for you."

Alex glanced at the clock on the wall. It was still some time before he was needed at Hogwarts for Severus's party. The teachers wanted the students somewhat settled before they all headed for the teachers' lounge.

"Headmaster Dumblin, I think-,"

"Dumbledore," Alexius corrected, although not without a bit of amusement.

"Yes. He contacted the restaurant and spoke to Cook. He told her that he needed you at Hogwarts immediately."

"Did he indicate why?" The tall man moved toward the coat rack and pulled down his cloak and scarf.

"He said something was wrong with Professor Snape," she shivered when her boss went totally still. She stopped a flinch when sharp dark eyes turned her way. Cliantha hated to admit how much he unsettled her. "He said that your husband needed you as soon as possible."

With a sudden feeling of urgency running through him, Alexius threw on his cloak and scarf and grabbed a wide, silver and blue medallion from his pocket. He began rushing his employee out of his home. "Go back to the restaurant and tell Cook that I'm at Hogwarts. I'll return tomorrow," he said briskly. /At least I hope I do./ Because he wasn't sure what he would do if something had happened to Severus.

Turning his back on Cliantha, Alex activated the portkey by pushing in the little blue gem in the center of the silver Celtic medallion. /You had better be alright, Severus. Merlin, please./ He disappeared, leaving behind a worried waitress and horrible images his injured husband.

TBC

Alia: (glowers) Damn it. I thought that was at least ten pages. (shakes head) REVIEW!!! Tell me your thoughts. My mental abilities have been destroyed. (mutters) stupid college. REVIEW.


	10. Chapter 10

Alia: (dressed in battle armor) Okay. So yes, I haven't updated in a good damn while. Life's been hectic okay. And yes I haven't been updating the website or my livejournal. Life's been hectic alright! But things should be getting back to normal. Or as normal as they ever were.

For those people still reading Second Chances, I have the next damn chapter summarized. Stop cheering and squealing. It's summarized. That doesn't mean too much when it comes to me. Also, I'm working on two hp stories. One has already been summarized. I'm not telling you about them. I don't even know if I'll ever get them up. I'm trying to concentrate on this story and the others I haven't finished. Pray on that one.

Good news. Someone is doing 'Time, Truth, and Sacrifice' in Hungarian. I'm still shocked that people liked that story but I enjoyed it so I might try to come up with another plot for a mystery story.

So anyway, I'm alive and here is the next part of the what-was-suppose-to-be-a-freaking-oneshot story. Hope you enjoy.

Oh and one last thing. A confrontation with a certain boy who lived should be coming up in a couple chapters.

* * *

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: Sadly, I don't own Harry Potter. I would like to but JKR does and I don't think she's inclined to share.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

* * *

/Am I right?/ Albus couldn't help but ask himself as he stood waiting for Alexius to appear. The words spoken by Severus's usually silent portrait haunted the Headmaster greatly. Usually Albus was the sort of man that knew he was taking the right direction. He always knew that with every decision he made there was a chance of unfortunate consequences. Dumbledore had always accepted those chances with a heavy heart.

Said heart was currently singing with a sickening dread. Albus found himself honestly scared about calling Alexius. Severus deserved to be happy after so many bad years and Alex was apart of that. He didn't know if he could face the potions master if he was a direct cause of their relationship's failure.

He shook his head. "No. Alex loves Severus too much to let him go." At least Albus hoped so. He didn't know Alex as well as Severus but both men sported their insecurities. "No." Dumbledore sighed at the intense whisper of reassurance. He squeezed his hands as he continued to pace at the gates.

Dumbledore breathed a sigh of relief when he saw a worried Alexius appear. As the man hurried toward him, the bearded man hoped that his decision was right. /Severus shouldn't be alone. We made that mistake last time and almost lost him./ "I see you received my message." He raised his hand slightly in welcome.

"Albus, Severus? Is he alright? The way the message sounded..." Alex wasn't happy with the frown on the Headmaster's lips at Severus's name.

The older wizard cleared his throat. "I promise you that Severus is physically well, Alexius. However, something happened-,"

"What?" Snapped Alex. He was growing more and more anxious to see his husband. "He was fine when we spoke yesterday."

"Yesterday," Albus started. He knew not to delay Alexius as it would only raise the man's ire. "He did not know that Harry Potter would be getting married on his birthday." Dumbledore watched as Alex straighted and the man's dark green eyes narrow.

A snarl crossed the pub owner's lips. "So he married that red-headed slut did he?" He snorted.

The headmaster had to hold himself back from automatically defending the former Miss Weasley. In all honestly, that was the growing consensus among the staff. Minerva, the girl's former head of house, hadn't been nearly as kind. She had been the one to find Severus not long after the situation had hit it's climax.

Dumbledore did admit to feeling surprised at the amount of venom in Alexius's voice and expression. He knew that Ginny had done wrong but this was a bit much wasn't it? Albus smiled mentally. /Responding to Severus's own feelings./

Albus nodded. "Yes. It was in the Prophet this morning. Apparently they had a very early wedding."

Disgusted, Alex looked at Hogwarts. "And it's bothering Severus? That's why you called me?"

"No, my boy." Albus tried to ignore the dark look Alex sent his way. "Severus's reaction was rather-. He didn't know how to react to the information."

Alex shrugged. "I'm sure he'll calm down soon. Potter is out of his life now."

Albus didn't say anything. The look on Alex's face told him that he should have heeded the warning issued by the portrait. Alexius was scared. The younger wizard was concerned that his husband was still very much in love with Harry Potter.

* * *

"This is fucking ridiculous! I'm worried over nothing!" muttered Alexius as he hurried down the halls toward the dungeons and Severus's rooms. His husband's quarters were rather deep into the castle so he had a few minutes to think as he continued toward his destination. Unfortunately the walk provided him time to think that he didn't want to use.

/So why if I'm worried about nothing, am I sick to my stomach?/ He slowed as he reached the dungeons and headed down the long corridor to Severus's quarters. /He loves me. I know that./ Severus had never said those exact words, thankfully because Alexius wouldn't have believed him, but he had always known the older wizard's feelings.

But Alex's self assurances didn't remove the fact that Severus had at one time loved Harry Potter. The potions master had planned to marry and start a family with the sniveling bastard until Severus found out about the Weasley girl. If Potter had kept it in his pants, he and Severus would still be together and Alexius would still be alone in Greece.

Alex clenched his jaw with a silent snarl as finally arrived at Severus's rooms. He was starting to become angry and frustrated at the idea that his husband was still in love with his ex. What he'd do if he saw that pained look on Severus's face...

He was honestly afraid to know. He loved Severus. This man was his husband, friend, confidant and a good deal more. Alexius had told Severus so many of his secrets and past. He'd fought to never open himself to anyone because he'd gotten sick of people fucking with him. And although they hadn't loved each at first, they cared now. So if Alex had to see his husband heartbroken over some bastard that wasn't worth Severus's time of day, he was really worried how far his anger would take him.

The snake in the portrait stared at him silently. Its upper body swayed lazily side to side in what would have been a hypnotic motion had the visitor been paying attention to it. Alex had to wonder if the damn thing knew what was going on, not that snakes were stupid or anything. He also had the feeling that the unknown man in the portrait knew everything that was happening. Because while the snake remained silent, the portrait sighed. "I see Dumbledore summoned you."

"Is he inside?" asked Alex sharply. He wasn't in the mood to deal with the damn portrait and whatever advice he wanted to give. The fists at his side tightened. And considering that his mood was going in a bad direction, he wasn't even sure he was ready to deal with Severus. Alex had a horrible temper, a result of past experiences.

The man remained silent and opened without Alexius giving him the password. Glaring, a million wild predictions running through his head as to how the confrontation was about to go, Alexius walked inside.

As the entrance closed, the man inside chuckled. Because really, those boys were so entertaining for him.

* * *

_"What made you care for him? In the beginning." He received a long stare. "Was he that good looking?" He smirked._

_The other man snorted. "No. No, I have to honestly say that he wasn't very handsome."_

_"So what made you care for him so much?"_

_"A lot of fucking guilt."_

* * *

Alex gasped as he realized that he was finally standing in Severus's rooms. The haze of growing anger and frustration were fading fast to be replaced by the earlier emotion of fear. /What the hell was I thinking coming down here?/ He yelled at himself mentally. His hands trembled.

Sure he had been angry seconds ago, but now? Now that he was actually about to see his husband and face the emotions buried in those dark eyes? Alexius was scared.

He looked around the room, seeing no signs of his husband but an empty cup of tea and the wrinkled newspaper on the coffee table. Tilting his head a few degrees left, he listened for Severus and could hear the sound of running water. /A bath?/ He thought as he walked slowly to stand before the fireplace.

Turning his back to it, he looked down at the coffee table and slightly crumbled newspaper. It looked as if someone had squeezed it between their hands before tossing it aside. Alex leaned slightly and picked up the paper. He gently smoothed out the black and white Daily Prophet and read the large headline.

"Hero Marries Long Time Sweetheart." Alex shook his head as he watched the happy group of people in the Prophet's front page photo. Harry Potter stood there with a stupid grin on his face with his bride's hands in his own. Surrounding them were a large group of redheads, Hermione Granger, Remus Lupin and a few others. "You really are a pathetic creature aren't you, Harry Potter?"

He tossed the paper back onto the table but didn't remove his eyes. The sad orbs did find a new target and the emotion in Alex's eyes seeped into disgust and hatred.

He wasn't really a fan of red haired women after his wife. The woman had betrayed Alexius and then left to join his enemy while she was pregnant with Alex's unborn son. He hadn't even known she was pregnant until after she'd left. The horrible situation had left him resigned to a dead child until his lover had taken in the boy. His eyes saddened for a swift moment even as a small smile crossed his face.

Alex looked at Potter's happy face. Was it a mask or was the man really happy? Well the idiot had made his bed. /You keep her, Potter. And maybe one day you'll see it. She'll be killing you and you won't know it until it's too late./

"Alex?"

He didn't lift his head but continued to stare at the picture. /But thank you for being the broken coward that you are. I finally have something good in my life again. Even if it used to be yours./

"Alexius?" snapped the voice, starting to become concerned and impatient.

"Oh I'm sorry, were you saying something, Severus?" Alex looked up at his husband with an amused look.

Severus scowled at him, even as he finished buttoning his robes. "Aren't you early?" asked the potions master before he folded his arms.

"What? I can't come to see my husband on his birthday?" he asked with a growing grin.

He was replied with a disgusted snort. Severus walked over a pressed a small kiss to his younger spouse's lips, unknowingly calming the younger man. The professor looked down at the paper and sighed. But Alex heard annoyance and anger in that voice rather than the sad broken heart that he had expected.

"So you've read it?" Severus sounded resigned as he picked up the paper.

"Yes," Alex answered. He winced at the wariness in his tone because he knew it would be caught. The sharp look from Severus confirmed it.

"Whatever foolish thought you have going through your head, remove it."

"I don't know what you're talking about." He cursed at the emotion still be heard in his voice. The former auror simply couldn't stop being nervous.

Severus stared at him. "No. Of course you don't." The comment was soaked heavily with a mocking sarcasm that only Severus could manage.

"Severus-," Alexius started, not sure what he was about to say. He didn't know if he was on the offensive or defensive of their conversation. In fact he wasn't totally certain of what conversation they were having.

The older wizard tilted his chin up and stared at Alexius directly. "You think I'm upset about Potter don't you?" Severus's voice had gone flat.

Alex found that he was having a hard time meeting his spouse's eyes. "It's understandable isn't it?" He fidgeted and in the back of his head, he was surprised at the motion. He had been trained out of displaying exploitable emotions years ago. "The two of you were planning to marry. And Al- I mean you just-," /Shit./ It's a wonder he hadn't gotten killed long before now. Good thing his mentor was dead.

"Albus told you to come early. The truth, Alex."

For a moment, Alex honestly thought about lying but he did not want the argument to get even worse between him and Severus. For Merlin's sake, it was the man's birthday. No reason to make things worse.

Pressing his lips together tightly, Alex nodded sharply. "Yes, he told me." Seeing the potions master's eyes flash, Alex sighed. His shoulder slumped. "I was working on something at home when I got a message from the pub. Dumbledore had sent a message that something was wrong. I didn't know whether you were hurt or injured."

"So you came straight here?"

"I practically ran here, Severus." Alexius rubbed the back of his neck. "I met up with him at the entrance and from what he told me, I expected you to be laid up bawling your eyes out."

That earned him a look that forced the pub owner to take a step back. "Bawling my eyes out?" Severus said, grinding his teeth.

Alex gulped and put up his hands. "Okay, so I was exaggerating." He huffed. "I thought you'd be upset that- that everything was really final. Because now Potter's married."

Severus shook his head and looked at his husband like the man was an idiot. "Honestly, Alex."

"Severus, please remember what you told me." At the inquisitive look sent his way, Alex continued. "You told me what you were like after the situation with Potter came to light. You told me how much you loved that boy, and how much he had hurt you. What was I supposed to think?"

"That things between Potter and I were final when I decided to stay married to you."

His mouth hung wide as he stared at the now amused professor. He hadn't thought of that. Alexius hadn't thought not once that Severus would think of things that way. Yes, of course they were married and cared for each other greatly, but at the same time their marriage had been an accident and Severus had loved Potter to the point of starting a family with the man.

Chuckling softly, Severus lifted a hand and closed Alex's gaping mouth. He cupped his husband's chin. Dark green eyes stared into his. "I'm not sad that Potter is married, Alex. I couldn't care less now. His name only brings anger and humiliation to me. And yes," Severus nodded, "I did love Potter, but that was before he betrayed me and left me for Ms. Weasley simply because everyone wanted that fairy tale ending instead of the one he chose. Alex, Potter made his choice and I have made mine. I don't love him." Severus sighed. "I know you don't like the words, but I do love you, Alex."

Alexius lowered his eyes and grasped the hand holding him into both of his. He was shivering, feeling more vulnerable than he had in a very long time. It was like his whole world had been shaken by those last few words. The last time Alex had been so rocked by life was when he'd woken up married that first morning next to his new husband.

"Severus," Alex tried to swallow and found it difficult.

"No. Be silent and listen to me, Alex. I will not leave you. Do you understand? Not for anyone and certainly not for Potter. He can burn in hell as far as I'm concerned. Albus did not realize that I was furious today because that rotten coward had the nerve to marry on my birthday. It was done as one last slight at me and he knew what today's date was." Severus felt the rage from earlier that morning start to build again and took a deep breath. If he wanted his words to stick, he needed to concentrate on his worried husband.

"If your former lover showed up," Severus began. Alex's eyes widened as they snapped up to stare at Severus. "And no I didn't specifically mean 'him', but if he did come here, would you leave me?"

The sentence had barely finished before Alex shook his head furiously. "NO! No. God no! I would never-,"

"So stop thinking that I would leave you. Stop thinking that I want Potter anymore. And if you ever think that I'm pining away for that fool, I'll hex so that you'll feel it in your next lifetime. Do you understand what I am telling you? Alex?"

"I-I understand." A small smile was starting to crawl over Alex's face.

Severus scoffed before slipping his arms around his husband's waist. Alex leaned in and dropped his chin on Severus's shoulder. "Good. It's embarrassing being married to a complete imbecile."

Alex laughed into Severus's collar. "Sorry about that. I didn't think I was so insecure. Think it's left over from my ex?"

"Merlin only knows."

Alex leaned into Severus, allowing the older man to hold his weight. He kept silent for a while simply enjoying the moment and the knowledge that he now had about his other half.

He breathed in Severus, enjoying the warm, fresh scent coming from the professor. "Showering for your party?" he asked lowly.

Severus tensed before relaxing with a disgusted snort. "No. It's more like I lost my temper in my lab and broke a few unstable ingredients. It covered my robes and hair so I had to shower."

"Um..." Alex raised his arms from Severus's sides to wrap around his shoulders. "Does that mean you would have a problem with another shower?"

Severus rolled his eyes and pulled back to stare at his husband. "Is that all you think about?" he said exasperated. However, the raised eyebrow and a smirk pretty much gave Alex his answer.

* * *

The mood in the lounge area for the professors was rather somber. Everyone on staff knew about Harry Potter's latest stunt and no one was happy about it. After speaking to Alexius and his own doubts still plaguing him, Albus had said nothing more about the situation. The old wizard was actually doing a very good job projecting a jovial mood despite what had happened.

Albus was constantly moving around with the other professors and the house elves getting prepared for the birthday party. The cake was set on the center of a large table along with other favorites of Severus and his colleagues. Flitwick and Hagrid worked together putting up more decorations, while McGonagal and the others organized gifts and small games.

While the Headmaster's attitude helped relax the other professors, it still didn't pull the situation and the emotions tied to it from their minds. No one could stay attentive on their jobs long enough. Each of them were wondering just how Severus had taken the news. Of course they would all see the potions master at his own party, but most wondered if Severus was even in the condition to attend.

Poppy fussed with her clothes as she stood impatiently waiting for the party begin in the next hour. She did her best to ignore the smiles Albus sent her way and it wasn't working. He knew it wasn't working, which was why he was standing behind her, ready to grab her if she headed for the door. Dumbledore had told them all that Severus needed time to himself.

But Poppy had reached the point of ignoring Severus's wishes years ago.

She stepped forward only to be caught at the elbow. Pomfrey turned to see Albus shaking his head. "No, Poppy. Leave him be for now."

The mediwitch glanced around to see their nosy colleagues looking their way while failing to be properly discreet. "I know that's what he wants," she whispered. "But Albus, please remember that I am the one that had to treat him after that silly child's confession."

"I understand that, but he will be fine. Alexius is with him now."

Poppy winced. "Is that a good idea? I hope Alex doesn't get upset."

A pang of concern hit Albus as he wondered if things would turn out in his potions master's favor. He'd seen the flash of pain on Severus's face and the uncertainty in Alex's eyes. The two men were newlyweds that were still getting to know each other. But they would be fine.

"Poppy. If it would make you feel better, how about we go and fetch Severus from the dungeons?"

The witch nodded with a bright smile that held a hint of knowledge. Albus ignored the mischievous glint and escorted Poppy from the room.

"You do believe that he's fine, don't you, Albus?"

"Yes. I do not believe things to be as terrible as last time. He also has Alexius."

"Good. Severus deserves better than Harry Potter."

Albus couldn't quite stop the flinch. "Many would say it was the other way around."

She sighed. Once upon a time, she had been one of them. "There are very silly people in the world, Albus."

* * *

"It looks terrible." Alex mumbled. He stared warily at the small clay pot in his husband's hand. He didn't see Severus roll his eyes heavenward.

"Alexius, this ointment works perfectly."

"All your potions do." It wasn't a comment meant to flatter. Alex was simply stating a fact. He had yet to see anything Severus made fail.

A small curve of a smile was on Severus's lips. He continued. "And while it looks bad, it has a spearmint smell and if anyone wanted to know, for any nefarious reason," he gave his husband a hard look that was felt rather than seen. "It's tasteless. So you shouldn't have a problem with me using it."

Alex squirmed in his position over his husband, trying to discreetly shift his lower body away without any pain. "Do I really need it? I'm fine."

Severus scowled at the head laying on his shoulder, the man's head directed at his hand. The rest of Alex's body laid sprawled across Severus's, their legs tangling slightly. "So you don't mind flinching every time you have to sit? In front of MY colleagues?"

Dark green eyes looked at him as Alex raised his head and turned it toward Severus. The two men held the gaze before Alexius sighed. "No. The last thing I need is Hooch and Vector giggling at me. Those two are way too interested in our sex life."

"Exactly." Severus kissed his husband, switching the ointment to his right hand and rubbing Alex's scarred back with the other.

Alex closed his eyes and sighed feeling the warm hand run over the heavy ridge in his back. It didn't distract him from Severus opening the jar. "Can't I do it myself?"

The older wizard gave his husband a blank look. "As if you can reach back there so easily. We aren't that young anymore. At least you aren't."

Alex coughed and gave Severus a nervous look. "I um... I'm not sure about you reaching back there like that."

"Didn't bother you an hour ago."

Alex lifted his upper body with his arms and hovered over Severus with a glare. The man wasn't at all fazed. "You know what I mean."

"And I don't care. You do this to me all the time. At least my head isn't between your legs." Much to Severus's amusement, a bit of color appeared on his lover's face.

"THAT didn't bother you an hour ago."

"Of course not."

Alex dropped his head and laid back atop his husband. There were days you simply couldn't win.

For a long moment of time, it was quiet except for rustling sheets and few soft mummers. Severus had not finished before the knock at his portrait came. Alex turned over onto his back, his breath slightly elevated to glower at the empty doorway of their bedroom. "At least they didn't come straight in," he snarled softly.

Smirking, Severus rose and headed to the door. He stopped as a shirt struck the back of his head. The wizard turned to glare at his lover.

Alex closed the ointment and sat it to the side. He stared at Severus, ignoring the continuous knocking. "I don't need any of your colleagues ogling my husband."

Severus snorted. "I don't think you'd need to worry about that even if I walked out there naked." Severus threw on the shirt, then closed the top button of the trousers he'd been wearing. He walked out of the bedroom.

Alex sat up, crossing his arms over his knees. The hell he didn't have to worry. Now that he was eating properly and taking care of himself, Severus's body was healthy and strong. He knew that if nothing else, his husband would get his share of glances. Which was honestly the last thing Alex wanted.

/That reminds me./ Alex thought as he stood from the bed. He looked around for his clothing. /I better warn Severus that those idiots are coming./ If Severus thought the professors and Cook were interesting, he hadn't met Alex's old friends from the Ministry.

Those four idiots had been away in China for the last two years. Each had been located in a different region of the large country and it had been completely impossible to contact any of them. Not that he would have. Nevertheless, when they returned, they would hear about his marriage.

Alex's mind sent various images into his head about what could happen. He winced violently before quickly dressing. He really didn't want to think about that anymore.

He exited the bedroom without his robes or shoes and nodded at Poppy and Albus, each who greeted him with a pleasant call of his name. He glanced at the clock a little confused. "Has the party started early? I thought you were coming right before it started."

"Poppy had concerns." Severus answered, brushing a hand down his now buttoned shirt. He didn't bother voicing what those concerns were. Everyone knew. "Also, the party will begin early."

"Everyone is becoming a bit restless," said Albus. He smiled brightly, the shine in his eyes dancing as he watched Alex stand beside Severus. The two men had a bit of a glow about them. It relaxed Albus. The headmaster knew that both men were alright.

Pomfrey smiled. "So are you ready for your party, Severus."

He raised an eyebrow. "We both know this party is an excuse for the others to drink themselves into a stupor."

She smirked while Albus burst into laughter. Alexius looked a bit shocked. "You're joking?" He exclaimed.

Severus shook his head. "One hour. You'll see."

* * *

Alex could not believe what he was seeing. It wasn't possible. The odd bunch of professors were rather weird but this was a bit much.

Because Alex couldn't be watching Flitwick chase Miss Norris around the lounge with his wand, while shrieking about spading and her owner sobbed desperately in a ball in the corner. "My baby! My baby!" Filch wailed.

Because there was no way Hooch was laying on a table, in what was supposedly a seductive pose, singing a dirty muggle song she proclaimed to have heard from a student. And Sinistra and Pince couldn't be telling her to take it off. NO! That was not happening. Alex's mind couldn't contemplate that kind of horror.

Because the former auror did not hear Trelawney proposition Minerva of all people. The transfiguration professor who then loudly proclaimed that the wannabe seer wasn't man or woman enough for her. Sprout and Vector, both horrendously drunk, were not pointing and laughing at the two women. Well Vector was laughing. Sprout was sobbing and begging McGonagall to 'give poor Zyball a chance.'

Alex looked at Severus and Poppy, each who gave him understanding looks, before turning back to watch Albus Dumbledore try, and inevitably fail, at trying to drink Hagrid under the table.

The Hogwarts Headmaster was sprawled across the table with a large bottle of scotch in one hand and a wet stick beard covering his face. His robes had raised up a bit to display his bright turquoise socks. Hagrid was swaying slightly with a bottle in his hand that stood about two feet tall. Half of it was gone and Alex wondered what kind of moonshine the half giant had. It wouldn't be long before Hagrid had fallen flat on his arse.

Severus shook his head and stood. "I'll have your hangover supply ready by morning, Poppy."

The nurse nodded and smiled sweetly. "Just remember to give Albus and Hagrid a stronger dose." She waved at them as Severus guided his traumatized husband from the room. "Have a good night dears!"

The castle shook once on their trip back to the dungeons.

* * *

__

"What did you say?" he asked, surprised at the answer.

"I said that he was...assaulted."

"You said he was raped." He paused. "I know that can be traumatizing, but his reactions were that severe?"

"When you're repeatedly raped and beaten by more than a dozen men, I think traumatizing is something of an understatement."

TBC

Alia: Okay review. Seriously. REVIEW. Tell me your thoughts while I go on with my evil plans for this story. Should probably work on my youtube video though. (shrugs) REVIEW!!


	11. Chapter 11

Alia: *looks guilty and holds sign that says: ALL REASONS FOR EXTENDED ABSENCE CAN BE FOUND ON PROFILE* And I would like to say sorry. This chapter was suppose to be longer but it seems that isn't going to happen for a while. So I put this up. This is most of what I wanted to post. Please don't expect too much. You guys aren't the only ones that are upset about the unfinished stories. I can only try.

But please enjoy the only thing I can offer currently.

Thanks to everyone for reviewing and reading even during my uh... lost period?

Enjoy more of the was-supposed-to-be-a-oneshot.

Title: Expecting The Absolute Weirdest

Author: Alia

Part 1/1

Rating: R

Pairing: Severus Snape / Original Male Character; Severus Snape / Harry Potter

Spoilers: I'm not exactly sure...HBP spoilers (just not the way you would think)!

Warnings: slash, language, angst, humor?, AU

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter. Besides I'm still mourning the last book.

Summary: Two men facing painful losses drown their sorrows, and make an already interesting rollercoaster much more interesting.

Author's notes: This is just a silly little story. I don't even know why I'm writing it. I think it may be one of those feel good stories. NO SAP. It makes me sick to my stomach. Ah well. Here goes.

Expecting the Absolute Weirdest 11

"Auror Agathon! Welcome back. Can I help you?" The woman smiled flirtatiously at the brunette standing in front of her desk.

Alexius pulled up a polite smile and shook his head slightly. "Remember that I'm a former auror, Evangeline. I don't work for the Ministry anymore."

For a moment, the secretary looked like she wanted to laugh in his face but all she did was smile wider. "What brings you here today, Agathon?"

"Is Vegra in? I have an appointment with him today." He leaned against the desk slightly, his hands pressed flat against the marble. Alexius honestly didn't want to meet with Orion Vegra. The man was his friend and mentor during his time as a Grecian auror, but Orion knew him too well. Unfortunately, for Alex, that was usually his downfall when he was dealing with the Head Auror.

Evangeline nodded. She pointed to a corridor that lead back toward the Auror headquarters and offices. Alex had been down that hallway many times since he'd come to Greece. "He's been in his office all morning. Just go on in. His secretary's gone for the day."

"Thank you." Alexius moved swiftly down the hall, not wanting to delay this song and dance any longer than he had to. He knew exactly how everything would go. Oh a few things always changed but the gist of his visit to the ministry always remained the same.

Alexius would enter the office. Vegra would welcome him like he was a long lost son. The two men would chat about the pub and the auror department. They would quietly speak about Alex's friends currently in Asia. Then, Vegra would bring up some mission, usually a very dangerous one, that he wanted to convince Alex to take.

Although he never really mentioned it, Alex, Vegra, and anyone that had worked with the former auror knew that Alexius was damn good at his job. Too good at times. More than once had he worried people with what they had considered his homicidal tendencies. Alex considered it a need to finish the job no matter what.

That's what Vegra liked about him. That's what made the old auror call Alexius back even though he was done with the ministry after one mission pulled up memories that Alex did his damnedest to forget.

The pub owner winced at the reminder of that mission as he stalked down the corridor. Too many bad memories leave too many scars. And Alex's scars were everywhere.

Alex, reaching the heavy wood door, knocked twice in quick succession.

"Come in!" The annoyed voice could be heard clearly from inside.

Snorting silently, Alexius opened the door and walked in. The former auror stuck his foot out and closed the door behind him. "I see that you're as busy as ever, old man."

The desk, the large wingback chair, and the left side of the desk were all covered with stacks of paper. The floor was littered with loose sheets that had fallen away from their designated positions. Alex found that he wasn't surprised to see the huge mess of paper work. Give the old bastard a suicide mission and he'd come back without a scratch. However, if Vegra's secretary wasn't around, the man was utterly hopeless with it. He simply wasn't the type of man to take the time and write things down and became too annoyed with any type of office work.

Alex never would forget the amount of bitching he got when Vegra had to file his resignation.

The tall graying blond standing on the other side of the desk, glowering hatefully at the mysteriously growing pile of papers, blinked in surprise as he instantly recognized the familiar voice. Sharp brown eyes snapped up, followed a second later by a huge grin. Orion Vegra gave a booming laugh before walking around his desk, stepping carelessly on the papers lying on the floor.

"Where the hell have you been, boy? I've been looking for a distraction all damn day!" Vegra opened his arms with a smile and Alexius found himself returning it gladly. When he'd come from home and arrived in Greece, mentally and emotionally dead, Vegra had been the one to find him and give him a new purpose in life. Of course all of this happened after he'd saved Vegra and one of his aurors from being killed by a pissed off centaur.

"I have my own things to do, old man. I can't always come see you." Vegra smacked the back of his head with a chuckle. The two smiled at each other before Alexius moved to take a seat in one of the chairs in front of the desk.

Vegra walked behind his desk and stared for a long moment at the pile of papers in his chair. Then, with a shrug of his broad shoulders, he picked up the pile and tossed it toward a corner of his office. Alex dropped his head to hide a grin as Vegra took his seat with a satisfied sigh. "Much better."

"So how's work, lad? That place of yours still in business?" There was a noticeable sneer in Vegra's tone. Alex didn't take too much from it. He knew that Vegra was still pissed he'd retired for a restaurant.

Alexius raised an eyebrow. "Still bitter, hmm? And yes it's going fine. You'd know if you actually came by more."

Vegra scoffed. "What in Circe's name do you need me there for? To keep you company?" He grinned then, a malicious glint in his eyes. "Is that old crow not paying you attention anymore?"

The look on Alex's face had frozen many a man or woman, innocent or guilty. Unfortunately, it never worked on the man and woman that he used it on the most. Cook and Vegra seemed to have a complete immunity to it. He sighed. "Oh she's keeping me busy. As per usual, she tosses things my way as if she's the bloody owner, then bowls me over when she thinks I'm not doing it right." Vegra burst into laughter as he continued. "It's only gotten worse since I married Severus. You would not believe what that old battle axe said to me at Christmas."

"I'd believe it, lad! I'd believe every word of it!" He snorted in amusement. "That one is certainly something." A shiver ran down Alexius's spine as he remembered what happened the last time Vegra and Cook were in the same vicinity. Hopefully, Severus would never know what happened that day and Alex would live with his shame silently.

"And how is that husband of yours, that I have yet to meet?" Vegra shot his former auror a disapproving look that Alex brushed off easily. As if it were the first time he'd gotten that look. "He teaches doesn't he? Never thought you'd be one to play with a teacher."

Ignoring the comment, Alexius answered. "Yes. He's at Hogwarts until June I think. Didn't I tell you Severus worked there?" asked Alex when he saw the slight surprise on Vegra's face.

"I'm sure I'd remember if you told me that. What's he do?"

"He's the potions professor. And one of the few masters in that area."

"That is a dying breed, isn't it? We're going to have a good deal of trouble when we really lose the rest. I suppose the new Mr. Agathon isn't thinking of taking an apprentice anytime soon?"

"I doubt it. He's having enough trouble with his usual students. Why?"

Vegra grinned proudly. "Guess who has found her niche in potions?" He looked every inch of a proud godfather.

Alex's eyes widened before he gave an easy amused smile. "I thought Eris was focused on Charms? When did she change her mind."

"She was down in forensics and a good bit of that uses potions. She's always been interested in that as a career. I'm just waiting for the girl to finish university before I can get her down there."

"I'm sure she'll love that." He smirked at Vegra. "And I'm sure you'll be pleased as well. Hopefully, this means the number of 'complaints' about the lack of good aurors will fall." More than once had Vegra actually been thrown out of the Minister's office because of his whining. The only reason Vegra still had his job after those incidents was because no one was better than Vegra.

Vegra looked disgusted. "Boy, if there were any good aurors left in this fucking department, I wouldn't have to complain!" The snapped reply grew louder toward the end. "My best damn aurors are either retired," he paused to glare at Alexius, "Or off to another damn country undercover. Until that lot comes back I'm stuck with the sheep!"

"When are they coming back?" Alex asked, barely fighting down a harsh burst of laughter. "Will the operation take another year?" It was after all a rather complicated case his friends were handling.

"No! The department wouldn't have made it through another year. I'd close down the whole damn sector if I had to. Luck has it that everything should be over in another month." Vegra looked rather pleased at that and Alexius couldn't help but feel the same.

"Really? That soon? Last time I asked, you told me everything was falling apart over there."

"Well it's certainly better now. I'll let them tell you the finer details when they get back. And speaking of details..." Vegra purposely glared at a portrait along the side of his wall. Alex nodded and watched silently as Vegra stood and walked over.

"Those papers better be in the same place, fool," snarled Vegra. The man in the portrait glowered. He was a portly old fellow who usually looked rather pleasant. At least until said portrait was speaking to Vegra.

"Don't speak to me as if you're king, Vegra! Have some respect! That was always your proble-,"

"My problem was having to deal with an old arse like yourself. You worthless excuse for a Department Head!" Alex never said a word when Vegra spoke that way toward his former boss, but he had to take a moment to keep his laughter silent.

"How dare you! The department was excellent under my guidance!"

"Yes! Because a bunch of idiots sitting around all bloody day and not actually helping anyone is how a fucking auror department works! Shut up!" With a dangerous gleam flickering in his eyes, Vegra slammed his fist against the portrait twice. And after a howl of anger from the portrait, the back of it moved forward, allowing Vegra to grasp the papers in the small space behind it. By the time he slammed portrait back against the wall, the former Department Head was gone.

Vegra looked smug as he walked over to Alex with a manila folder and a few other papers in his hands. He tossed the folder to Alex and sat with a papers in hand. "An old friend of yours has been causing problems. A week and a few days ago, there was a break in here at the Ministry, but nothing was taken and nothing was stolen. Apparently, the two men were searching for some vital records. There is no solid question of what they were looking for but we have photos of them lingering around this department. We didn't see who the accomplice was. The sneaky bastard managed to hide his face but as you can see, we did managed to find out who was with him." Vegra leaned back in his seat and watched Alexius' face darken considerably.

"How is this bastard out of prison?" said Alex. His hands ever so slightly shook with fury as they held the photo. "I thought we finally took care of him."

"He escaped. How do you think he got out?" Vegra sighed with disgust. "We need someone to keep a better eye on that damn prison." He looked at Alex, and was amused with the younger wizard's rage. "As for taking care of him, considering the fact that you nearly killed him and disemboweled his cousin," Vegra shrugged. "I suppose that was my fault. We should have waited a little longer before calling medical to the scene."

The two wizards had been a special case that had angered and horrified Alexius. Dorian and Gyles Leva were cousins from an old family that had originated in an ancient cult of all things. The cult had a practice that was rather close to Satanic worship in the muggle world but Alexius personally thought that was rather tame. The cult had started as worship to Hades and death as a welcoming event. The history before Hades and his marriage to Persephone showed ritualistic suicides and sacrifices. It honestly wasn't too bad in the beginning. Those that were beyond help with illnesses or those desperate to join loved ones were often involved in those situations. It wasn't until the tales of Hades' marriage came that things became 'twisted' for lack of a better word.

It was afterward that some of the cult members began taking 'brides'. The thought alone was enough to make Alexius ill. Because the brides were simply innocent victims. According to the history of the cult, the 'brides' were tortured to death. It was a quick way for the victims to want death sooner. Alexius personally thought the sick bastards got off on it.

After the victims' deaths, the women, and at times men, were mummified. For the wizards of the cult, this was simple. An ancient preservation spell could take care of things in a quarter of the time it took Egyptians. The bodies were also easily more preserved which made the rest of the ritual simpler. The reason the victims were called 'brides' was because after the mummification was complete, the bodies were violated.

(Alia: *blinks* What the... *is horrified at herself* Ewww. *blinks* Hmmm. *raises eyebrow* Might use that again later.)

The Levas were descendents of the cult. The rituals had passed down through the family by written hand, hidden with shame and disgust. None of the cults activities were meant to ever be brought to life again. At least they weren't until Dorian's father had gone mad after the death of his wife. With the rituals from the cult, he had mummified his wife in order to have her forever. It had been a disgusting and rather pitiful affair, but things just turned awful when the cousins became involved. Both boys had been rather sadistic in the first place, but after getting their hands on the rituals, things had gone from bad to worse.

When the kidnappings began people did begin to worry, but there wasn't very much the Greek aurors could do. There were no leads and it simply looked as if the people just left. The problems began when a maid at a small inn discovered twenty mummified corpses on the outer edges of the property. All of the bodies, seventeen women and three men, had been found naked with marks of torture. Alex could still remember one of his colleagues running away to be sick at the inn after fresh semen was found in all the bodies.

The race began as more people disappeared but at the time only a few of the mummies had been found. Vegra, Alexius and the other aurors were doing their best at trying to track the killers but didn't even know who they were. Things were going well for the Leva cousins and bad for the aurors, at least until the men had picked the wrong woman to attack. Sara was one of Vegra's top aurors, but she was a bit empty headed at the best of times. So when the men had seen the klutzy brunette literally skipping toward her house, they had attacked her. Unfortunately for them, Sara had fought back leaving both men running for their lives.

When the Levas had been found, Vegra had invaded their home and had the place searched simply because they pissed him off for daring to attack one of his aurors. Needless to say no one had been expecting to walk in on over 30 mummified bodies in the men's attic. Twenty five were women, six men, and a 13 year old girl. Two of the bodies, the girl and one of the women, were found in the bedrooms of Gyles and Dorian. The evidence was damning and after a complete fluke they had their men. Or they did until the bastards killed the auror guarding them with the mummification spell and escaped.

Two months with people disappearing to be found as mummies later before another trail was found. They'd discovered the cousins living in a graveyard of all places and occupying an empty tomb. Alex and Sara had led the raid to capture the two men but somehow the whole thing had gone bad. No one had known that the cousins had brother wands. None of them had known that when brother wands stood together, they were extremely powerful.

Two of their colleagues had ended up unconscious, three had been killed, and Sara had ended up in the hospital for blood loss after fighting to protect the man and his nine year old daughter. As for Alex, he had ended up retiring after snapping when he found one of the twins trying to rape the man while the victim was trying to protect his daughter after her beating. It had hit too close to home on a very painful memory. Alexius had found himself in the infirmary of the Auror Department later after Vegra himself had knocked him out. He'd damned near killed both men. It was close for Dorian as Alexius had sliced the man's torso open.

"Gyles still doesn't know where Dorian is does he?" asked the former auror. "If those two get together again..." The two men were put into completely different locations in order to prevent another catastrophe with their magic. Besides, Alex didn't want to go up against brother wands that stood on the same side. He didn't even want to lay eyes on the necrophiliac cousins again if he had the choice.

"Believe me, lad. I know better than anyone. It was the first thing I checked. At least we still have one of our idiots in lock down. I've alerted them to add security." Vegra frowned at the papers in his hands. "I have a feeling that Gyles is trying to find his cousin's location."

"Shit." Alex muttered, completely unable to stop himself. "What a nightmare that will be!"

Vegra leaned back in his seat and began rummaging through his desk drawers. Alexius knew for a fact that the man was searching for a cigar. "Do you know if he's been active since he's been out? Have there been any kidnappings reported? Any bodies found?" asked Alex.

"Nothing." Vegra grimaced and crossed his arms. He hadn't found the cigar. "I've had people start checking when he disappeared but I'm not too worried at the moment. You know that Gyles isn't exactly the brains of the operation."

"True. The idiot is sneaking into the Ministry as if we won't see him here!" Vegra nodded as both men shared a look of embarrassment at the show of sheer stupidity. "So you have no idea about the accomplice? Most people wouldn't work with these two," Alexius continued.

"We think it's a professional. A very good one too if he managed to get past all of the Ministry's security and the security in this department." Vegra looked annoyed. Muggles had it so much easier. They didn't have sneaky bastards finding magical ways around their security. "The idiot must have promised to pay him later for his services."

Alexius eyed Vegra with a serious look. "So what exactly do you need me to do?" He was after all called in for a mission.

Vegra met his gaze head on. "I need you to catch the son of a bitch and that partner of his when they try to sneak into the Ministry tonight. They're getting too close to finding where we've hidden our secured files."

"Why me? You do remember what happened the last time I fought with the Necro Lords," Alex asked with an unamused tone. There was simply too much venom in his voice at the mention of the cousins.

"Like I said, the one helping is professional. He nearly made it into the evidence stronghold two days ago." Vegra nodded at the slight widening of Alex's eyes. The evidence stronghold was a large room that had been turned into a preservation vault to keep case evidence safe and unchanged. The vault had two doors that led inside and out and on both sides of those doors were combinations that were seven numbers long. There were also runes along the edges of the vault doors that would keep anyone without permission out. Alexius had seen the security measure of the stronghold at work. If the man could get through those, he really was a good thief.

"I'll be damned."

"Exactly. That means that he's strong enough for me to need one of my better aurors. And since the ones still in service aren't even in the country, that leaves you. This shouldn't be too difficult for you. You've taken more dangerous missions then this. All I need you to do is catch them before they find those files. They still haven't realized where they are yet," Vegra paused to look at the floor, "and I want them caught before they do. That way we get toss them both away and I won't have the Minister after my head."

Alex nodded in full understanding, looking at the photo of the man he needed to catch. "This should be relatively easy since Gyles doesn't have Dorian's wand to assist him. The unknown is the real problem."

"Don't let this turn into a fiasco, boy. Just take them down quickly."

"Of course." He smirked at Vegra. "I have to admit I saw a bit more danger in my future." The words brought him a hint of amusement.

"I have to start going easy on you, now." He mirrored Alexius's smirk. "You're a married man now. I try not to let idiots get themselves killed when they have a family to take care of."

Alex didn't know why but he was suddenly unamused. "Severus has nothing to do with my involvement with the Ministry."

Vegra scoffed. "He does when he's married to you. It's too soon for me to make that teacher a widower. The two of you haven't even made it a year yet."

"Orion..." Alexius gave a small warning that was ignored yet heeded.

"Besides, you WERE my absolute best. You should be fine." The old auror sighed. "I wish I could thank that old mentor of yours."

"That old bastard is dead and in the ground. It's for the best. He was a more difficult version of you after all."

Vegra burst into laughter.

* * *

"How long will the assignment take?" asked Severus later that evening. The two men were speaking through the floo as they often did.

"Not too long, hopefully. I may have it done by tonight. As things currently stand, I don't think this assignment will be too difficult." Alex said.

"I thought you said the thief would be a problem? You don't know anything about the man." Severus was a little concerned at how flippant Alexius sounded about his assignment. His husband was usually serious when it came to his business.

But as he thought about it, the potions master realized that the last time Alexius had an assignment from the Ministry, he'd sounded the exact same way. As if he barely cared about what happened on the assignment. As if he could handle anything the world would throw at him. As if he didn't care about who lived or died, including himself. It was strange how the lack of self-preservation and the sheer tone of godliness came out in the same tone.

"I know that he's helping one of the few people I would strangle even in public." Alex shook his head. "He's a thief. He may have some fighting and dueling skills but no matter how good he is, I'm better. I shouldn't have too much trouble with either of them."

Severus scowled. "That's very arrogant of you, Alexius. I honestly didn't think you'd exhibit such behavior in response to your job."

Alex gave Severus a cool look in response. "It's not arrogance, it's understanding. I understand that I am better than he is, criminal or no. As I said, no matter how good he is, I'm better."

Severus hesitated for a moment before shaking his head and continuing. During his marriage, he'd learned to hold back some of his more biting comments. That was not going to happen today. "Oh no. It's most certainly arrogance. You act as if you're the god of Aurors. Alexius, you and I both know that anything could happen. What if this thief is more dangerous than you think? At least stop dismissing things." Honestly, thought Severus, you would think that the man would at least have some concern for the future. Severus wondered if he was doing such a poor job at expressing his concern. It didn't matter too much. He wanted to get Alexius to think before he went running into danger.

"Severus," a darker tone creeping into the younger wizard's voice. "Do not underestimate me."

"I'm not underestimating-," snapped Severus.

"The hell you aren't!" shouted Alexius his face shifting with his growing ire. "I have been an auror for years. I know what the fuck I'm doing! I have been in every dangerous situation there is and I always come out on top. So stop fucking patronizing me."

"Do not talk to me that way, Alexius Agathon!" Severus couldn't believe that the conversation had progressed to such a point in just a few seconds. For Merlin's sake, they had only been talking for a few minutes and just moments ago things were fine. But here was Alexius blowing up at him. Yes, he and Alexius argued and did so as often as any couple, sometimes more, but this argument had something else attached to it.

"You aren't the only one who has been in situations when things are dangerous and when things can go wrong. You aren't the only one with these experiences."

Alex snorted derisively before he spoke, his words dripping with something foul. "Yes, but there is a big difference when someone is an Auror and when someone is a fucking Death Eater."

Severus's face turned to stone despite the shocked sick feeling in the pit of his stomach. Alexius knew his history, but never had the man used it against him. Alex had always told him that he did not care about what Severus had done before. The wizard has said that he had done much worse in his life. That had obviously been a joke.

The swift change of expression from Severus finally snapped Alexius out of his sudden funk. The man blinked with a growing disbelief as he quickly reviewed the words that had spewed from his mouth seconds before. He didn't have a chance say another word, especially not an apology because Severus spoke first.

With an icy undertone, Alexius hadn't heard in months, Severus spoke in a clear voice. "If I had wanted my past thrown into my face, I would still be with Harry Potter." He closed the floo connection without another word.

As Severus slowly made his way to his bedroom, he would never realize that his verbal strike had hurt his husband as deeply as Alex's had hurt him.

* * *

_"It hurt so damn much when I found out. And there wasn't a damn thing I could do."_

_His companion was silent for a moment. "I..." He paused. "Are you better off for it? Now that it's all over." His reluctance to ask the question was clear in his voice._

_"I wish I could say yes, but everyday, I have to wonder."_

TBC

Alia: *stares at readers* Please don't hurt me.

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